The Review AE

Red State. Smarter than your average horror flick.

2011-10-15T15:20:00.007+04:00

Some of the best horror movies ever made usually have more to them than mindless violence, gore and death. Red State is one such movie. This violent escapade that is half Texas Chainsaw Massacre, half The Devils Rejects, takes the 'dark side of rural America' horror sub genre and elevates it by several notches; being more intelligently focused on its social and political message than on its bloody body count.

Throughout history there have only been a few horror movies that have dared to go for a level of intelligence not normally seen in the genre. The 70s had Dawn of the Dead, the 80s had Poltergeist, while most recently we have had 28 Days Later and The Mist. Although Red State may not be as symbolic in its delivery as some of these other movies, it is intelligent with its message and story that is based purely in the realm of reality. Here there are no zombies or vengeful spirits, only cold hearted killers driven by religious belief.

Written and directed by comedian Kevin Smith, this movie does not take a swipe at religion like his earlier feature, the untactful and tasteless Dogma, but instead it focuses squarely on the fundamentalism and extremism that people may develop as a result of their religious zeal, and how this can lead them to do the most horrific and misguided things in the name of 'morality'.

Taking a page or two out of Hostel, Red State follows the adventures of three teenage boys who plan for an evening of sexual debauchery with one older woman, during one night, at the same time. However the three suddenly find themselves in the middle of a twisted nightmare when a religious cult targets them for their sins, making them the next victims of a ritual sacrifice. The situation ironically goes from bad to worse when the cult's plans swiftly spiral out of control, as a county sheriff with a dark secret of his own, accidently stumbles upon their activities and calls in the FBI to help rescue the teenagers.

Red State is brutally violent and disturbing; but one should remember it is a horror movie, and so its purpose is to horrify. However and unfortunately, like most horror movies, all of its characters lack development and depth. Thus when the body count swiftly rises amongst the good guys, the audience can find little empathy for them. Other issues that prevent this movie from getting a higher score includes some seriously offensive and unnecessarily crude language, as well as the screenplay's overall unfocused nature: Red State has no principle protagonist, thus the story constantly shifts perspective from one group of characters or individual to another, which ultimately only further distances the viewer from all of them, making just about every person in this movie less likable or relateable.

On the upside, the audience is constantly reminded that this movie was written and directed by a comedian, so its rare moments of humor cleverly bounces from witty dialogue to some very black comedy, therefore producing some genuinely funny 'laugh out loud' scenes. Although the left-field twist ending and resulting coda somewhat derails Red State's pacing, this should not detract from the overall enjoyment of the movie.7/10

Bad Language: Very Strong.
Sex and Nudity: Brief nudity, but very strong verbal sexual references throughout the first 30 minutes.
Violence: Very Strong.

There's a new Star Trek tv series in the works....

2011-09-02T21:12:00.004+04:00

.... and it will not be following the events of the 2009 relaunch. Rumor has it that the 45 year old franchise that got a new lease of life via LOST maestro JJ Abrahms, maybe coming back to the small screen as a show following the events of the TV show Star Trek:Deep Space 9 (DS9) which ended its run in 1999 and the previous Star Trek movie Nemesis, that was released in 2004.

JJ Abrahm's 2009 version of the 1960s

In an interview at the 2011 Star Trek Convention in Las Vegas, David Foster, a consultant who had previously worked on DS9 and Star Trek:Voyager, explained that he had began developing a project in 2006 with a synopsis that examined the future of a Star Trek universe tainted by that epic war with the Dominion that occurred during DS9's final seasons and a growing Klingon unrest following a decades on and off peace treaty with the Federation. But fans of the recent 2009 movie should not fear as that part of the franchise has already established itself as continuing in an alternate universe, with a second movie (Star Trek 12) still on schedule for a 2012 release.

Now Star Trek has been around for nearly half a century, but by the time it went into hiatus 6 years ago, it was suffering badly due to a weak television series no one was interested in watching (a dull prequel show simply named Enterprise that was abruptly cancelled in 2004) and a movie series that had become expensive, cliched, lethargic and self indulgent. Thus in order to remain hip and relevant, Foster plans to take a leaf out of Abrahms' book and populate the new 8 year series with a young vibrant cast, state-of-the-art action and special effects, and a return to the core vision of Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry. In other words, its going to have the look and feel of a JJ Abrahms movie, but set post Star Trek: The Next Generation.

DS9, the darker side of 90s Star Trek

However do not expect anything like the lighthearted fair of the original 1960s series, as the 90s cynicism of popular shows like the X-Files and Millennium that found its way into the Trek universe via controversial episodes of DS9, will still be present in this new show. On DS9, Roddenberry's colorful optimism of the future was chopped and skewed into several shades of grey by series producer Ronald D Moore - where the line between good and evil often became blurred, providing the franchise with a sense of gravitas and realism that despite proving somewhat popular - took it away from the childlike naivety of the 60s show. Thus for this new series, Foster says that central to its premise will be complex questions that address the following dilemmas:

“If evil wore the face of a hero, would you recognize it? If freedom came in the likeness of your oppressors, would you accept it? If you were your own enemy, who would be victorious?”

I'm hoping this new show gets signed off quickly and moved into production, so he can answer these questions.

Ridley Scott to direct Blade Runner sequel

2011-08-19T16:31:00.000+04:00

Before Ridley Scott has even had his chance to single handedly rescue the Alien franchise from the dire mess which is Alien: Resurrection, Aliens vs Predator and Aliens vs Predator: Requiem, with the upcoming Alien prequel Prometheus, he has already signed on to direct a followup to his other sci-fi classic Blade Runner.

Now rumors of sequels and prequels to classic movies are common place online, and unfortunately for one reason or another, they do not manifest. Talk of two Stargate movies that follow the original 1994 theatrical release and ignores the TV franchise have been circulating for years despite the legal dispute between Devlin/Emmerich and MGM, while The X Files 3 and The Matrix 4 and 5 sequels seems to be put on indefinite hold, if not already cancelled. However with Promethius on the way, The Thing prequel set for imminent release, and Jurassic Park 4 now in pre-production, it seems some dreams do come true.

Apparently Scott will make the next Blade Runner movie with Alcon Entertainment, producing with Alcon partners Broderick Johnson and Andrew Kosove. According to Deadline.com, this would be the most high profile project for Alcon since its cute but cheesy family drama The Blind Side.

The company had gained control over the rights to Blade Runner earlier this year, but if this rumor is true and Ridley Scott is actually involved in their project to expand the movie's mythology, it seems that any sequel (or prequel) that may get made, will most likely go straight to the top of the box office, and not straight to Sci-Fi Channel.

Introducing: The Avengers

2011-08-13T15:06:00.007+04:00

So the cast of characters are assembled and the stage is set; all four key members of the Avengers are finally here. With 2007's Iron Man and 2008's The Hulk establishing the joint universe of the Avengers, 2011 saw the final two major components of the Marvel comic book team reach the big screen: Thor and Captain America. Next summer the hype will begin, but before we go there, here is a basic rundown of who the Avengers are and why if a Justice League of America movie is ever made, it will have a lot to live up to. Its time to get my geek on:

Iron Man

Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) is the playboy head of Stark Industries, a major military contracting company inherited from his father. When kidnapped by a Supervillain-Terror group, 'The Ten Rings' in Afghanistan, he is forced to build a weapon, but instead secretly builds an exosuit to escape, a suit the media eventually dubs the Iron Man.

Nick Fury

General Nicholas Joseph "Nick" Fury (Samuel L Jackson) is a member of S.H.I.E.L.D, an espionage and law-enforcement agency whose initial stands for the Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement and Logistics Division. This organization have been charged with gathering together the members of the Avengers. Being led by Sam Jackson, automatically solidifies its badass status.

The Hulk

The Incredible Hulk (Edward Norton and Mark Ruffalo and err... Eric Bana, kinda ) is the emotional and impulsive alter ego of the withdrawn and reserved physicist Dr. Bruce Banner. Because of his exposure to gamma radiation, he automatically transforms into the Hulk when stressed, enraged, or excited.

Black Widow

Natasha 'Black Widow' Romanoff (Scarlett Johansson) originally appeared in the comics as a highly trained former Soviet spy working for S.H.I.E.L.D. In Iron Man 2 she initially appears as Pepper Pot's (Tony Stark's assistant) personal assistant Natalie Rushman, and proves to be somewhat of a rival of Pepper for Stark's affections. She eventually reveals herself as a Matrix type babe, skilled in multiple ways of kicking a guy into ten shades of blue.

Thor

Thor (Chris Hemsworth) is the Norse 'god' of thunder. Problematic because of his 'god' status (yeah its shirk), this superhero is exiled from his homeland of Asgard to Earth, where he falls in love with a woman, pursued by other mythical type creatures and finally recruited by the Avengers.

Captain America

A character from a time when America was still cool and not hated, Captain America (Chris Evans) was once a sick Depression era child name Steve Rogers who finds himself enhanced to 'the peak of human perfection' by an experimental serum helped developed by Tony Stark's father during the 1940s. The serum develops him into the 'First Avenger', a title Marvel prefer to use when promoting the film abroad, because most people outside of the US are not really digging the whole Captain America name.

Mooz-lum (Review)

2011-08-12T17:11:00.002+04:00

Balancing a fine line between family cheese and intelligent social commentary, Qasim Basir's first feature length movie Mooz-lum makes for an interest tale that highlights the issues Western Muslims have been facing of late. Proclaiming to be a true story, this drama looks at several issues centering on one Muslim African American family led by a surprisingly older looking Nia Long (most well known as Will Smith's girlfriend on The Fresh Prince of Bel Air) and Roger Guenveur Smith from Malcolm X and Final Destination.

Although from the outset via a flashback, life looks peachy and sweet for the family unit, cracks quickly begin to appear between the mother and father. A clash between Islamic liberalism and conservatism swiftly leads to a divorce and sets in motion a chain of events for the movie's central protagonist Tariq, the family's older child. Leaving home, he learns the hard way on how to deal with all of the issues that can possible face a young Muslim growing up in the West. But herein lies Mooz-lum's problem; akin to other movies that attempt to look at the social problems of minorities, this movie also falls into the trap of trying to say too much, in too little time.

Our hero Tariq is not only the product of a marriage where there is a fierce conflict between traditionalism and modernity, but he also has to deal with religious ignorance from his peers, child physical and sexual abuse, racial stereotyping, terrorism, physical relationships and a totally shoe horned in subplot about a Muslim college professor's relationship with his institution's dean (played by Danny Glover).

Yet despite its dense plot, Mooz-lum does not shy away from it's own convictions and message, thus ultimately elevating the complete feature to heights not normally seen in Hollywood, due to it's warmth, sincerity and morality. Although the ending maybe a little too saccharine sweet for a more cynical audience to appreciate - it is far from a happy one, as a twist in the story that occurs 15 minutes before the closing credits shifts the overall tone of Mooz-lum into the darker territories of a changed world, who's vision of reality has been distorted by jingoism and The War on Terror. 7/10

Bad Language: None.
Sex and Nudity: Some brief sexual references.
Violence: Brief moderate.

The Hobbit: First Pictures

2011-07-14T22:21:00.002+04:00

For those of you bored with all the Harry Potter mania and miss the days when fantasy movies were truly epic (like 8 years ago), fear not, it seems The Lord of the Rings prequel has finally managed to get out of pre-development hell; proof of which have come in the form of several slick publicity stills, three of which are below.

The Hobbit

So far so good. The question is, is The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey and its sequel There and Back Again, going to follow the Hollywood trend of being overtly 'dark' and grim (like The Lord of the Rings Trilogy should have been)? Or are they going to stay true to the original novel that they are both based on and simply be a lighthearted children's story?

Why Mission Impossible 4 is going to be good for Dubai.

2011-06-30T21:24:00.002+04:00

Left: Tom Cruise chased across the DIFC by what looks like The Mummy. Right: Paula Patton

It looks like The Dubai Tourism Authority is going to be thanking Hollywood for whipping up a huge sandstorm and blowing it over the Dubai International Financial Center (DIFC aka the emarate's financial district) both literally and figuratively in Tom Cruise's latest blockbuster Mission Impossible IV: Ghost Protocol.

Many young Dubai residents who are as geeky as I am, whether they would like to admit it or not, are pretty excited about what the latest movie to feature Dubai would be like, especially given all the unwarranted international negativity it has been experiencing lately.

Although the whole Lawrence of Arabia/The Mummy type sandstorm thing may seem somewhat cliched and silly, its inclusion in the new Dubai based Mission Impossible does appeal to that whole 'fake Arabian exoticism' that Dubai's PR machine sometimes like to whip up when promoting the emirate to the world.

Jealousy of the emirate's success and (exaggerated) failure has now become the norm especially with lowbrow international news organizations from the US's Fox News, to the UK's The Sun newspaper, capitalizing off the popular 'Dubai hate machine' with increasing vulgarity. Finding any excuse to bash the emirate with stories that range from half true, to straight up false is as popular as ever. However the emirate's reigning in of its own generated PR hype has begun to pay off as more moderate international voices have begun to demonstrate a support for Dubai that not only shows a more balanced view of the city, but also an honest one.

Scaling the Burj Khalifa

Now epic sandstorms engulfing the emirate's financial district or super spies jumping from The Burj Khalifa may not be an honest depiction of daily life in the UAE, but this is Hollywood, its fun, its escapism and most importantly its positive and this is what Dubai needs right now when it comes to international exposure.

During Mission Impossible IV's pre-production, Ahmed Abdulla Al Sheikh the Managing Director of Dubai Media Incorporated said, "While supporting culture and the arts, the emirate pays special attention to the film industry. Cinema is a powerful medium capable of building bridges between people and cultures. The importance of Cinema lies in its universal appeal.”

With its freshly released trailer featuring that classic Mission Impossible theme fused with an RnB soundtrack performed by Eminem and Pink, and boasting some impressive stunt work, special effects and two of Hollywood's biggest up and coming stars: Oscar nominee Jeremy Renner, and the cute Paula Patton who is tipped to be the next biggest black actress in Hollywood following Halle Berry, Mission Impossible IV looks like it could be a good vehicle for Dubai to ride, and vice versa.

The Adjustment Bureau and other mind-benders...

2011-06-19T13:24:00.004+04:00

About to be released on Blu Ray and DVD is The Adjustment Bureau, a reality bending sci-fi thriller that comes in the vein of The Matrix, Dark City and The Truman Show, movies that questioned the very nature of existence, reality and fate. I am a huge fan of these kind of movies, when they are done well. It was not until the 90s when a growing fear of government power, its technology and 'The Big Brother state' started garnering public attention that movies like these became a Hollywood mainstay, and since The Matrix trilogy's release, there have been many clones of the series that have generously borrowed from them to varying degrees of success, the most recent being The Adjustment Bureau.

A more worthy successor to The Matrix than its two sequels, The Adjustment Bureau finds an unrealistically young potential presidential candidate's life (Matt Damon) disrupted by a 'chance' encounter with a quirky ballerina (Emily 'The Devil Wears Prada' Blunt). However what starts of as a charming romantic comedy abruptly turns into a conspiracy drama rife with 1950s and 1960s Cold War paranoia, with the main conflict of the film based on a secret, seemingly omnipresent government type organization that is controlling the lives and destinies of everyone on the planet.

Based on the short story ‘Adjustment Team’ by Philip K. Dick, The Adjustment Bureau was adapted and directed by George Nolfi. Like The Matrix, Nolfi’s film depicts supernatural guardians not as magical entities but as smartly dressed men. However unlike The Matrix, these adjusters hark back to the 1950s, when the story was written, dressed in that era's clothing, and even featuring John Slattery from “Mad Men” as the key antagonist, behaving like a shady government agent who in another film would be assigned to root out Communist sympathizers from that era.

If you are looking for a film that is as epic as Inception, you wont find that here, but if you are a fan of The Matrix yet hated its sequels... plus have a thing for romantic comedies with depth, then this film is for you. Ignore the ridiculous religious and philosophical conclusion this film makes, that not even God can control the fates of men and just enjoy it for what it is, a fun fantasy. 7/10

Bad Language: Moderate.
Sex and Nudity: Some sexual references.
Violence: Light.

RnB Legend Quincy Jones teams with Emirati, Badr Jafr to boost Middle Eastern entertainment industry

2011-06-05T17:55:00.001+04:00

Jones and Jafr

Quincy Jones, the guy who turned Michael Jackson and many of the world's greatest RnB and New Jack Swing acts from the 80s and early 90s into the biggest performers on the planet, has teamed with Naomi Campbell's alleged ex boyfriend, Badr Jafar, the President of Crescent Petroleum, to launch a major initiative to kick some progressive life into the region's stagnant entertainment industry. CNN's Inside the Middle East today detailed the awesome venture between Jones and Jafr designed to 'develop entertainment opportunities' in the Middle East and North Africa.

A press release put out by Quincy Jones' team states that the project will initially focus on producing live entertainment opportunities in the Middle East for Western artists in collaboration with renowned Middle East and North African artists from right across the entertainment spectrum including books, movies, television and of course music. Beyond this it will also look to nurture new Middle Eastern and North African talent, and acquire content from the region to introduce to the West.

Badr Jafar said, "This partnership had been a long time in the making, and is being launched at an important time in our region of the world. I am a great believer in the power associated with the principles of social entrepreneurship, and the Global Gumbo Group's mission is perfectly in line with these, using music and the arts to build on and promote mutual respect and appreciation across borders, while giving our youth in the West and the Middle East an opportunity to showcase their talents in our respective parts of the world, which in-turn will lead to much needed collaboration and cooperation. There is no better person in the world to spearhead this venture than Quincy Jones, and I am truly grateful for his vision and commitment to making this world a better place for our future generations."

Jones added, "I have long been a vocal proponent of music and the arts being a great asset in building bridges between cultures, and from my many experiences starting in 1953 touring the Middle East and North Africa with Lionel Hampton and again in 1956 as the musical director and trumpeter for Dizzy Gillespie's first State Department Tour, I have witnessed that ability firsthand. It is my hope that this partnership with my dear friend Badr Jafar will provide a cultural exchange between the West and the Middle East and North Africa that will foster a better understanding of these regions and an appreciation for our common values at this crucial time in the region's history."

Review: Carte Blanche or Why Dubai?

2011-06-04T13:38:00.000+04:00

Much like the rebooted cinema franchise that moved the adventures of 007 from the clichéd 60's superhero spy genre, to a 21st Century gritty Bourne styled thriller, the latest novel featuring James Bond also sees the book series finally rebooted for the modern age. Its 2011 and there are changes: The latest novel Carte Blanche, now has the secret agent as a significantly younger 30 Something year old who works for a secret division of the British Intelligence known as the Overseas Development Group. This organization has been established to deal with 9/11 type threats - so like the movies, there are no more super-villains on island hideouts with plans of melting polar ice caps with giant lasers etc. Furthermore Q has become an Asian tech wizard named Sanu Hirani, Bond's super gadget is now an iPhone, an iPhone with 'super apps' and finally a crucial part of the story is set in Dubai.

Although a lot of the promotion marketed Carte Blanche as a Dubai based novel, in reality only a small fraction of it is set in the UAE. When author Jeffery Deaver announced that he was commissioned to write the latest installment, and that it will be set in Dubai, the local media here over-emphasized the location's significance to the point that even its publisher 'Hodder & Stoughton' jumped on the Dubai bandwagon and exploited this location as a unique selling point for the book.

So what is the benefit of setting the latest James Bond novel in a 21st Century UAE, even if its just for 40 pages? Deaver stated earlier this year at the Emirates Airline Festival of Literature that he found Dubai to be a "truly inspirational city--a place of awe-inspiring sights, fascinating cultures and remarkable people." But of course there is more to it than that.

By the time the studio gets round to making its next Bond movie, Mission Impossible IV will have already wet the cinema going public's appetite for a big budget spy flick set in the UAE, thus Carte Blanche the novel would have served its purpose as an experiment for such a Middle Eastern setting.

But why Dubai specifically? Well it has become clichéd that in a post 9/11 world - when dealing with international terrorists in novels - a strong Middle Eastern element is a given. However when it comes to Bond, it cannot be just any Middle Eastern setting, it has to be one that is not only 'exotic' to the average visitor but also has to match the sophistication and lifestyle that can easily be associated with men who wear expensive suits, drive expensive cars and dine in the most expensive restaurants. Marrakesh and Cairo are just too dusty for this, most Westerners still 'dont even know what a "Doha" is', while Beirut erroneously carries a negative connotation with its name, thus leaving Dubai as the perfect alternative. With a brand image synonymous which the rich and famous, Dubai is now the new Monte Carlo, with an added but misconstrued perceived element of danger due to its Middle Eastern location.

Although this story lacks the wit of an Ian Fleming novel, Carte Blanche is still a marked improvement over the previous Bond story, the 60s based Devil May Care. Thankfully Deaver makes an effort to avoid falling into negative (and positive) cringe inducing cliches and stereotypes of the emirate and the region, while residents of Dubai can have fun reading about fictionalized versions of real locations.

Top 10 End of the World movies of the past 20 years (From worst to best)

2011-05-21T12:44:00.008+04:00

In celebration of some misguided notion that today May 21^st2011 is the apocalypse, comes this obligatory post about the end of the world. Whether be it an alien invasion, a zombie apocalypse, a robot uprising or a natural disaster, here are the best and worst.

10: Knowing.

Nicholas Cage is an actor consistent in his inconsistencies. His film resume is a mixture of cult classics and poo-bombs. Knowing falls under the latter, and oh does it fall. This sci-fi horror about a man who discovers a mathematical code in a vast sequence of random numbers, soon learns that the world will end when those numbers run out. What ensues after this revelation is a lot of running back and forth, driving back and forth, and more running back and forth, that all eventually amounts to nothing. 1/10

9: Dawn of the Dead.

Zack Snyder elevated himself to cult status with his hit comic book movie 300 based on Alan Moore’s graphic novel of the same name. Alan Moore quickly disassociated himself from the movie saying it was 'sublimely stupid'. Many can also say the same for Snyder’s re-envisioning of the 70s apocalyptic zombie satire Dawn of the Dead. Here Snyder manages to take a highly intelligent and funny critique of 70s consumer society and turn it into a dumbed down music-esque video, very high on style but very low on substance. 4/10

8: Vanishing on 7th Street.

amazon blu ray

This high concept horror about the planet being consumed by a literal living darkness - zapping its inhabitants into the unknown, had the potential of being a cult classic. However the originality of its premise and the excellent performances of Thandi Newton, John Leguizamo and newcomers Jacob Latimore and a very talented Taylor Groothuis, could not save Vanishing on 7th Street from being a train wreck. Not only were the shadow/creature effects weak, but the story is further hampered by a distinct lack of tension and atmosphere and an ultimately unsatisfactory and rushed conclusion. 4/10

7: The Happening

Hated by many people, M. Night Shyamalan’s The Happening was actually a decent, yet quirky movie. Its story about nature turning against man through the releasing of some unknown toxin into the air transforming anyone within distance into a suicidal drone, was both entertaining and disturbing. My only criticism of this feature is that for a film that is meant to be 'apocalyptic', it does not actually feel apocalyptic. If you are going to make a movie about the apocalypse, than this is one element you are going to try and get right. 5/10

6: Armageddon

You know when you have the words 'Michael' 'Bay' and 'Armageddon' in the same sentence; the end result is going to be loud, flashy and slick. This classic piece of pre-9/11 patriotic schmaltz, pits Bruce Willis and Ben Affleck up against a meteor heading towards Earth, while Aerosmith provide appropriate mood music in the background. Yes it lacks the substance, meaning and depth of its counterpart Deep Impact, but who cares? The story is tight and fluidic while the special effects are literally out of this world. 6/10

5: War of the Worlds

Perhaps Spielberg’s darkest movie to date, this underrated feature takes the 1898 source material of the same name to deliver an altogether more grim retelling of the HG Wells’ classic, while making a clever but veiled stab at its mid 90s version, Independence Day. This epic movie smoothly bounces between sci-fi and horror, detailing the brief war between the Earth’s armies and those seemingly indestructible giant tripods. 7/10

4: Terminator: Rise of the Machines

While Terminator 1 and 2 were about the fear of communism, corporate and military irresponsibility and the rapid progression of technology, Terminator 3 was just about making money at the box office. However its lack of gravitas compared to its previous films does not stop it from being a quality movie. Although its bleak ending (world nuclear destruction) is an obvious set up for future movies, Terminator 3 is well aware of its status as the 3^rd chapter in an ongoing franchise, and thus does not endeavor to take itself too seriously, often even making humorous fun of itself. 7/10

3: The Day After Tomorrow

Roland Emmerich has a thing for epic movies of the apocalyptic kind. Stargate, 2012 and The Day After Tomorrow are all movies showing humanity enslaved by both natural or other worldly forces and how we may choose to rise to these challenges. What elevates The Day After Tomorrow above his other features (and just about nearly every other film on this list), is its scientific plausibility. Although exaggerated for Hollywood effect, the issues of global warming and climate change are bought to the table and demonstrated in full CGI glory, screaming at the audience that we need to take action now, before it’s too late. Ignoring the redundant secondary plot concerning Denis Quad searching for his son, The Day After Tomorrow is Al Gore’s An Inconvenient Truth, tripped out on acid. 7/10

2: The Matrix

In essence The Matrix is about what happened after the robot apocalypse of Terminator and similar films have occurred. It poses an interesting question to its audience, asking ‘What if the apocalypse has already happened, but we just don’t know it?’ Here is the basis for this classic piece of cinema, rife with pre-millennial apocalyptic fears about technology and authority. The Wachowski's takes elements of Marxist philosophy to its furthest extremes by utilising’s Jean Baudrillard’s Simulation and Simulacre to critique the way individuals in society have allowed themselves to become enslaved to the distractional tools of work and entertainment, in order for it to remain operational. It’s a shame the studio messed up this entire premise with their lackluster sequels four years later. 9/10

1: 28 Days Later

Even with the eventual release of World War Z, and Dawn of the Dead 2, 28 Days Later will still likely remain the zombie movie to end all other zombie movies. Its director Danny Boyle has a tendency to make movies that despite being overly dark, grim and gritty are all also about the power of hope and courage. His ‘glass is half full’ view of the world evident in Slumdog Millionaire and 127 Hours is also present in 28 Days Later… his grimmest film to date, making a refreshing change to the now tired zombie genre.

Here his main character played by Cillian Murphy wakes up a month after an apocalypse has occurred, where he finds himself in a living hell populated by zombies. However the strength of this film is not in its horror premise, nor its gore and violence, but in how its characters face the unrelenting horror of everyday existence. Despite the destruction of their world, they choose to hold onto hope and not become the thing they fear the most: violent cannibalistic creatures with no sense of humanity, both in a literal and figurative sense. Here the end of the world has already happened, so the choice becomes, do they give up? Or do they hold on to hope and each other to fight another day and ultimately survive? 9/10

Arabian Gangster: The Devil's Double.

2011-05-08T13:13:00.000+04:00

Coming soon will be Hollywood's semi-fictional account of Iraqi playboy, socialite and all round psychopath Uday Hussein in The Devil's Double. We have all heard the stories about how twisted and sadistic Saddam Hussein’s son was meant to be. Stories of his decadent lifestyle punctuated by wild sex and even wilder violence have become almost apocryphal in a legendary sense, and thus makes good fodder for the latest Hollywood movie featuring an on-going Iraqi crisis.

Based on Latif Yahya's book I Was Saddam's Son (or more directly The Devil's Double), the movie adaptation stars Dominic Cooper in the lead roles of Uday Hussein and Latif Yahya - the enslaved body double. Ignoring the already growing controversy of the hiring of a white actor for the principle roles and the scripting of the movie in mainly English and not Arabic, The Devil's Double already looks set to be the Arabian equivalent of Scarface; a notion which is controversial in itself as it may inevitably paint Uday as an anti-hero, hero.

Now in his 40's Latif Yahya (not related to me btw) is a highly educated doctor and controversial blogger who was forced to become Uday Hussein's body double at the age of 23. His biographies The Devil's Double and The Black Hole details in a very tabloid but explicit manner his life as a man hired to make public appearances in the guise of Uday whenever a dangerous situation was expected. When Yahya initially objected to the job, he was arrested and held in harsh conditions until he capitulated, where upon he went under several months of training to become more like Uday in both speech and mannerisms. He also underwent extensive surgery to fix any 'flaws' that may have revealed his true identity. His controversial book is perhaps one of the most unsettling written as it shows the low levels of depravity Uday had sunk to. His account included stories of torture that will make scenes from the Saw movies look tame, as well as the gruesome and often bloody sexual torture of women and girls as young as 12.

Judging by the trailer, the movie retelling of his life looks like it will be your standard ultra-violent Hollywood treatment of real life events, so whether the film will be as dark and as brutal as Yahya's own account I have yet to see. The film was recently shown at the 2011 Sundance Film Festival to overwhelmingly positive reviews; however there were reports of some audience members walking out during its showing due to the graphic nature of some scenes.

Deconstructing the deconstruction of horror: Scream 4

2011-05-07T11:15:00.002+04:00

By the time Hollywood had reached the mid 90s the slasher/serial killer genre was already dying a slow and painful death due to being dominated by direct to video releases. After nearly 15 years Michael Myers was now lethargically slicing and dicing American teenagers in Halloween, while Jason Voores was already on his 13th or 14th Friday the 13th sequel. Even Wes Craven's very own Freddy Kruger after 5 sequels was no longer a frightening demonic child killer; he had now become a comedic anti-hero who the audience cheered instead of feared. So with the genre on its last legs Craven decided to put a different spin on it by breaking its fourth wall with the movie A New Nightmare, where the character of Freddy Kruger left the world of the movies and stepped into ‘our real world of the senses’, slicing and dicing his way through the production crew of what could be a 'Nightmare on Elm Street 7'. The film was only a moderate success; however it provided the metaphysical template for the more realistic and successful Scream franchise.

Scream 1 to 3 were a postmodern take on the horror slasher genre, breaking the fourth wall for comedic effect by paying homage to the original Nightmare on Elm Street, Halloween and Friday the 13th movies. 10 years after the end of the trilogy, Scream 4 was released, where it pretty much uses the same formula of the first three movies, in which characters have to rely on their knowledge of the horror genre to survive. The series has been successful as it deconstructed the common narrative of a typical horror movie by being blatantly self-aware of the fact that it itself is a horror movie. This was emphasized further with the inclusion of the Stab movies within the Scream movies themselves – were they retell the Scream story in the style of a movie within a movie. In a very clever opening sequence, Scream 4 begins with two characters watching Stab 7 before they get killed, while moments before, those characters of Stab 7 themselves are watching Stab 6 while critically reviewing the events of Stab 1 to 5.

Scream, Stab or Scary Movie?... This may get complicated.

By the time the original Scream Trilogy ended, another film franchise was launched based on it called Scary Movie. While the Scream movies are comedy thrillers with a main purpose of satirizing the horror genre, the Scary Movie series (or at least part one) were a parody of the Scream movies themselves, so in essence a satire of a satire. So by the time we get to the opening of Scream 4, it is established that the Stab series is also a satire of the horror genre, but within the narrative of Scream. Furthermore Scream 4 (or should we say Stab 7) actually copies direct visual cues from Scary Movie 3, with its choice of opening kills being Pamela Anderson/Jenny McCarthy lookalikes.

It should be noted that the name ‘Scary Movie’ was the original title for the Scream films before the Wayans Brothers took it for their own. A reference to this is made within Scream 4, where upon when Stab 2 is being played in the background; Robert Rodriquez’s name is shown as its director. It is a little known fact that during its pre-production phase when it was still called 'Scary Movie', Rodriquez was originally approached to direct Scream 1...

Now while in the 80s, 90s and early 00s the horror genre suffered heavily from sequel mania, the latter half of the 00s has seen the cinema going public endure an army of remakes and reboots. Of course Hollywood's obsession with reboots becomes the central topic of motivation in Scream 4. It criticizes Hollywood’s lack of originality and the audience’s willingness to accept recycled and rebooted entertainment instead of sticking with the originals. Its critical look at remakes (no doubt inspired by the reboot of Wes Craven's original Nightmare on Elm Street franchise and the superior remake of his The Last House on the Left), is interesting as prior to its release, Scream 4 itself had been marketed as a partial reboot of the original trilogy and the launch pad for at least three more movies. This metaphysical self-referencing is largely played for laughs as everything from Hitchcock's Rear Window (remade into Disturbia) to A Texas Chainsaw Massacre (and even a roundabout reference to Star Trek 11 and timetravel) are all mentioned indirectly, subtly and openly.

Finally, when watching Scream 4 its interesting to see how fashion, style and music have not changed much since Scream 1 debuted in 1996, so the movie automatically has a very old school feel to it. However there have been huge advances in technology and media in the past decade, a subject which the Scream films have always relied heavily upon to tell its story. In fact the only significant differences between the late 90s and today are our advancements in communication tech. While 15 years ago life revolved around mobile phones and videos, 2011 is about iPhones, Facebook, Twitter and YouTube thus Wes Craven goes out of his way to show how these technologies do not only aid in our communication and entertainment, but also help in turning nobodies into celebrities.

As sequels go Scream 4 is perhaps one of the best you will see. While some people may feel uncomfortable with the heavy amounts of in-your-face comedy this chapter has, its humour works far better than what we were given in Scream 3. The violence is strong, brutal and bloody and although the story may not be as dark and as adult as Scream 1 and Scream 2, for the fourth part in a series the quality of writing is still witty, strong, intelligent and better than anything you will see in similar genre franchises - like what we were given in the awful Final Destination and Saw sequels, both directly made fun of in this film.

Bad Language: Strong.
Sex and Nudity: None.

Violence: Very Strong.

7.5/10

A guide to Tablets, Apple, Star Trek and LCARS...

2011-04-20T13:15:00.000+04:00

The iReview AE: A geeks guide to Tablets, Apple, Star Trek and LCARS...

Picard with his iPad (PADD)

circa 1996

When Star Trek: The Next Generation began to make its cultural impact on the world, a lot of attention was paid towards its technological predictions. While much of what was portrayed on screen has been dismissed as 'technobabble', some of its science fiction were in fact based on real scientific theory and fact, and has even been the blu-print for real life technology that we use today.

Two such technologies frequently shown on the show were the tricorder and the PADD.... or what we now know in the real world as the iPhone and the iPad, (or tablets, PDAs, smartphones). Its been several years since the franchise went into its hiatus before returning for its big reboot in 2009, but looking back its fascinating to see the use of Tablet technology today, is similar to what we saw 10, 15 and even 20 years ago in the Star Trek television series.

Before Star Trek came along computers were big and by today's standards, cumbersome. The PADD seen on Star Trek: The Next Generation, Deep Space Nine and Voyager were fictional handheld computers shrunk down to what was then unrealistically small sizes. Today it is obvious that they have played an inspiration in the design and function of Steve Jobs' iPad. For those unfamiliar with the Trek Franchise, a typical PADD pretty much looked like today's tablets. Varying in size, they normally consisted of a large touchscreen display with a minimalistic manual interface or control panel (generally only one or two buttons) and were (or are, or..err.. will be) used for a variety of work and personal uses. (...more)

So whats actually good at The 4th Gulf Film Festival?

2011-04-16T14:02:00.001+04:00

The official press release for the 4th Gulf Film Festival (GFF) proudly states that it is the home of bold, experimental, and contemporary cinema from the Arabian peninsula. It seems like not a month goes by when there is not a film festival taking place somewhere in the region that promotes 'cutting edge Middle Eastern cinema'. In the past six months alone, we have already had Dubai and Abu Dhabi hold successful gatherings and now we have the Gulf Film Festival currently taking place.

Such frequent events are probably a reaction to the mainstream Middle Eastern cinema currently available, which to be honest 'sucks' and more than likely in its current form, would be laughed off the screen of any Western cinema if shown there. That is not to say that Western cinema is always picture perfect itself, but anyone familiar with locally written, produced and directed movies will be aware of the usual over the top shenanigans normally served up as entertainment here. Out of the many movies we annually produce, only a handful are in fact, 'good'. But thats just my opinion.

What is undebatable is that some 153 films from 31 countries, including 45 from the UAE are currently being screened at GFF. And from this mass bulk there are a few gems, including the Emirati produced The Caller which I breifly want to highlight upon... Think Scream meets The Ring meets the DS9 episode 'The Sound of Her Voice', and what you get is a psychological horror about a woman tormented by mysterious phone calls from someone who says she is literally in the past. Produced by Amina Dasmal, who according to Forbes is one of the ‘100 Most Powerful Women of 2011’, its good to see that some film makers like her and Abdullah al Kaabi who produced the short film The Philosopher, are raising the bar for Gulf cinema by making quality movies designed to cross cultural divides and broaden market appeal.

Director Nayla al Khaja who is currently working on her own supernatural thriller, Tobe Hooper's Djinn, said 'GFF has been an incredible festival for Gulf cinema and filmmakers. It’s our own festival, where we can really come out and show our cinema. Today in the region, there is a lot of investment and interest towards training and education. We’re also seeing new grants and film funds.” Hopefully with events like these the Middle East and in particular The Gulf, will soon be able to distribute in mass, quality movies abroad.

For more on regionally produced movies check out this post, and follow the links.

The Green Hornet (review)

2011-04-15T18:40:00.003+04:00

It took me nearly a week to get through to the end of The Green Hornet. When a movie takes longer than its official run time to watch, then it’s usually a sign that it’s a bad film that has little in it to hold the viewer’s interest. However that is not to say that Seth Rogan’s interpretation of the 1960s superhero is unwatchable, because ironically it is actually a visually striking movie. The directing is very creative; the cinematography above par and the styling is classy. However all of that is wasted on a story that is boring and its resulting script that can best be described as sluggish.

Following the exploits of a rich playboy wishing to bring an end to organized crime in LA, The Green Hornet has the aesthetic look and feel of Christopher Nolan’s Batman movies. Michel Gondry, the creative force behind The Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind, should be credited for this by delivering yet another visually impressive movie. However it’s toned down washed out colors intended to give that ‘real world’ effect which instantly separates it from more obvious superhero flix such as The Watchmen or The X Men, directly clashes with this script’s infantile dialogue, over the top characters and underdeveloped story - that to be fair, does have elements of a good thriller begging to be let out. So instead of getting a dark comedic version of Batman Begins, this origin story ends up being little more than a bromantic comedy littered with car chases, gadgets and explosions.

Story issues aside, this film does have to its credit some nifty Matrix styled martial arts (a Hollywood trend revived for the new decade’s advances in 3D technology), while Seth Rogan and Jay Chou as the two leads, display an obvious chemistry when portraying one of those platonic - yet awkwardly close bromances that Rogan has become famous for writing about. Unfortunately Cameron Diaz as the beautiful and potential love interest, does little more than phone in her lines, while the movie’s main antagonist is so dull and nondescript, the script itself almost breaks the fourth wall by constantly making fun of how boring his character is.

Overall, The Green Hornet is a good looking movie that is just not that interesting to watch. 6.5/10

Bad Language: Moderate.
Sex and Nudity: Some sexual references.
Violence: Moderate.

Mad Men renewed for 3 more seasons starting 2012, but will it still be good?

2011-04-02T11:05:00.000+04:00

Season 4

The near cancellation of Season 5 of one of the most intelligent, critically acclaimed and commercially successful shows of the new millennium, exposed that a major battle had been taking place between it's creator Matthew Weiner and television network AMC. It appears success came with a price for Mad Men as AMC apparently had asked Weiner for three conditions on the show's renewal, conditions designed to capitalize on its popularity and ability to make more money: 1) More integrated product placement. 2) The shaving of two minutes off each episode to allow added commercial time, and 3) The cutting of two series regular cast members.

It has now been confirmed that at least two more seasons are now in the works, with Season 5 premiering in 2012. Yet while no principle cast members will be dropped, more product placement will be integrated into the storyline but strictly under 'Weiner’s complete creative control.'

I am not too sure how a balance between good storytelling, creative control and product integrity can be maintained on a drama about 1960s ad executives dealing with real life brands, when thus far we have seen some pretty uncompromising, albeit fictional portrayals of the people behind those brands. For example, so far the 'Hilton' name has been tainted with a less than flattering portrayal of its founder, while the son of the CEO of Lucky Strike cigarettes (a real brand from the 60s) has been shown to be a bisexual bully who demeans women and preys on married men.

Fortunately Weiner has yet to deliver a bad episode of Mad Men, and despite having his arm twisted by AMC his statement following the announcement of the show's renewal seems like a vote of confidence for its credibility continuing: “I want to thank all of our wonderful fans for their support,” he said. “I also want to thank AMC and Lionsgate for agreeing to support the artistic freedom of myself, the cast and the crew, so that we can continue to make the show exactly as we have from the beginning. I’m excited to get started on the next chapter of our story.”

Emirati kids just dont like reading books... apparently.

2011-03-20T10:21:00.003+04:00

Here's a quicky. Although I believe that the erosion of Emirati culture by Western influences is wholly exaggerated, some interesting points were made during a discussion titled ‘Emirati Authors Write for Emirati Children' at the Abu Dhabi International Book Fair 2011 (ADIBF).

Amazon: Gold Ring
(Volume 1)

Qais Sedki the author of the Arabic manga Gold Ring, which won the Shaikh Zayed Book Award for Children's Literature in 2010 believes that "The problem is that Emirati children and young adults do not currently have a wide variety of books or characters from our culture that they can identify and connect with, which is why they turn to other cultures to bridge that gap,"

The panel noted that for children and young adults, there are a lack of programs, books or characters that Emirati youth can identify with and enjoy reading about, saying that one of the reasons for this is because Arabic authors writing for children usually write at their audience, instead of writing for them.

The discussion was highlighted in Gulf News, where they quoted one of the panelists as saying "Other cultures have a strong foundation for writing children's literature… they have developed techniques that encourage children to not only read but also engage with the characters… unfortunately, in this region we are still struggling to find that technique."

Although there maybe some truths to this, I do hate these stories that often appear in the media that often reinforce a misconception and stereotype that Emirati culture is weak, none existent or even irrelevant amongst the current generation of young Locals, when this is far from the truth...

The American Jewish Committee vs the Palestinian perspective.

2011-03-16T23:27:00.001+04:00

Director Julian Schnabel has been forced to go on the defensive from American Jews, over his new movie Miral, a story about an orphaned Palestinian girl in the wake of the Arab-Israel war in 1948. The screenplay was written by Rula Jebreal, based on her semi-biographical novel that features a chronicle of Hind al Husseini, a Palestinian socialite known for rescuing 55 orphaned survivors of the Deir Yassin massacre, after they were dropped off in Jerusalem and left to fend for themselves. She later converted her grandfather's mansion into an orphanage to house them, which eventually became a school providing education to orphans and other children from Palestinian towns and villages.

Unsurprisingly the controversial subject matters of Palestine, Hind al Husseini's plight and the Intifada all appearing in a mainstream movie would not be without its controversy. The story of Miral - a girl who joined the orphanage a short time after it was established - follows her journey as a young woman torn between the First Intifada of her people and the belief that education, not conflict should be the road to peace.

With the film already premiering internationally in 2010, yesterday saw it's US premier at the UN General Assembly Hall, and with that the wrath of The American Jewish Commitee (AJC) as well. Prior to it's showing, the AJC issued a statement condemning both the movie and the decision of the UN to show the US premier there by stating:

"The film has a clear political message, which portrays Israel in a highly negative light [and] will only serve to reinforce the already widespread view that Israel simply cannot expect fair treatment in the UN.'

Slumdog Millionaire's Freido Pinto as Miral

Its curious how official members and supporters of a state that has been documented violating the human rights of the Palestinian people time and again, will still take time to single out a relatively 'insignificant' movie that has only thus far garnered 20% on Rottentomatoes.com. What makes this film special? Is it because it being shown at the UN serves as a type of 'official confirmation' that the actions committed against children in the country's name since 1948 can be construed as legitimate 'crimes' as the film implies? Or is it because the film maker Schnabel and its distributor are both Jewish Americans themselves?

To the AJC, a little advice: What is rule number one when opposing a movie that one may disagree with? Do not disagree publicly unless you want to generate lots of free press for it, especially when its subject matter is political, and the one doing the complaining represents that movie's bad guys.

Furthermore any rational individual, regardless of racial and religious background or even political affiliation, should not be afraid to ask the difficult questions when they need to be asked. Like any good cinema that attempts to be cutting edge, Miral is the latest in a series of movies made by Jewish film makers that dare to challenge the status quo of their country and are not afraid to shed a critical eye over controversial issues that makes the State of Israel and Zionism look bad.

Print vs Film... 5 movies that were better than the original books

2011-03-15T19:59:00.007+04:00

Some of the greatest movies ever filmed, were first some of the greatest books ever written. There are times when the visual interpretation and understanding of any given text, surpasses the original when it is put up on the big screen. Here the writer/producer/director with his/her acquired skill, not only knows how to faithfully adapt the book their film is based upon, but also capture it's author's true intent, better than what was originally written.

Yes the subject of 'print vs film' has been done to death on the internet, but as far as I am concerned comparing the book versions of Twilight or Harry Potter to their film counterparts should never really account for anything.

2001: A Space Odyssey

Amazon: 2001: A Space Odyssey.

Like Arthur C Clarke and Gentry Lee's poorly received novel Cradle, 2001: A Space Odyssey was obviously written with film in mind. Unlike Cradle, this earlier piece of work was actually made into a movie, and while the novel garnered some very good reviews - it is the movie that everyone remembers. This deadly slow feature that came out at the end of the 60's looks like it was made in the 21st Century due to its technical advances in film making, cinematography and styling, in addition to resetting the bar for all other future sci-fi movies made after.

Amazon

2001 forever influenced the sci-fi genre, putting a dent in the popularity of campy 50's and 60's sci fi examples like Invaders From Mars and Lost In Space, paving the way for more sterile and monochrome features such as Star Trek: The Motion Picture and Ridley Scott's Alien in the 1970s. Co written by Stanley Kubrick, 2001 is a masterpiece and a visual pleasure, and furthermore it has a movie villain that has now gone down in cinema history as one of the creepiest ever conceived in the genre: H.A.L 9000.

H.A.L is a computer with a personality that acts as the nervous system and brain for our protagonist's ship heading for Jupiter. This highly intelligent AI system was given one simple order: make sure that the ship reached its destination. However when the mission does not go as planned, and H.A.L fails to abide by the crew's pragmatism, it proceeds to kill them all, taking its lone survivor and the viewing audience on an almost existential trip into the historical progress of mankind: from cave dwelling apes, to the creators of self aware computers - turned serial killers. For me this is quality sci-fi, and I hope that one day the last two books in the series 2061 and 3001 will also be adapted for the big screen.

Stand By Me

Stephen King maybe known as one of the legends of modern horror, however it seems that his best work is usually in the genre of straight faced drama. Like The Shawshank Redemption and The Green Mile, Stand By Me is perhaps one of the best adaptations of a Stephen King novel ever committed to screen. Hell, I will even say it is one of the best screen adaptations of any short story written by anyone to date.

Amazon

Based on the novella 'The Body', (or 'Fall from Innocence') the story was originally published in King's 1982 collection Different Seasons. Stand By Me takes that story and turns it into something that is not only memorable, but also a true joy to watch. This coming of age drama about a group of children who find a rotting corpse in the swamp, stars a who's who of young 80s actors shortly before they became bigger stars in the 90s and 21st Century (albeit b-listers) including Wil Wheaton, Jerry O'Connell and Keifer Sutherland. Plus with Ben E King's classic Motown song Stand By Me perfectly articulating the friendship between the lead characters and serving as the film's soundtrack, this movie surpasses the original novella in nearly every conceivable way possible.

Jurassic Park

Amazon

The late Michael Crichton was an overrated author, however his intelligent and scientifically plausible book about the dangers of mad science gone amok was also adapted into one of the greatest movies ever made. Stephen Spielberg's interpretation of Crichton's Jurassic Park not only presented the brave new wold of the dangers of genetic manipulation in a realistic yet comprehensive manner, but it also revolutionized special effects, raising the bar for every other monster flick made since.

The novel itself was and still is prophetic in its examination of progressive science and technology, however the movie and its very own groundbreaking progress in technology is what will be remembered. For those of us lucky enough to see Jurassic Park in the cinema when it was first released and experience the hype, mania, and its effects up on the big screen, would probably agree that the movie not only nearly rendered the idea of 'reading a book' obsolete, but also at that time ran the risk of making print itself an extinct medium in the 20th Century. Thank God for the iPad and its clones (pun not intended) as examples of 21st Century technology that saved, and regenerated the written word.

The English Patient

Amazon

Romantic period dramas are not my thing. Movies about infidelity are not my thing. Films made by Hollywood set in Africa or the Middle East are defiantly not my thing; however the cinematic adaption of The English Patient went against all my expectations - leaving me in awe the first time I watched it.

Amazon

Sri Lankan-Canadian novelist Michael Ondaatje's bland, amoral, drawn out and tragic story, becomes a visual treat when watched on blu ray. From an opening sequence that shows wide vistas of a truly cinematic 'Arabian' desert, to a moving score by the Lebanese composer Gabriel Yared - to its all star cast featuring the likes of Ralph Fiennes, Juliette Binoche, Willem Dafoe, Kristin Scott Thomas and Naveen Andrews, The English Patient's slaughter of its competition at the Oscars should not have been unexpected.

Lovers of Egypt, World War 2 period dramas, engaging storylines and rich yet complicated characters will love this movie. And although I do take issue with the promotion of infidelity as a 'cool exotic thing', the tragic ending and the overall message of the film does to some extent make up for any questionable ethics being promoted here.

The Lord of the Rings Trilogy

Amazon

I first started reading the Fellowship of the Ring when I was in my early teens many years before a big budget cinema adaptation was even a possibility. It took me nearly a year to complete it and 3 years before I began reading its sequel The Two Towers. By the time I got around to the Return of the King, whispers of a Lord of the Rings movie were already floating about. However this was not enough to motivate me to complete the final installment. The novels were an excellent, albeit heavy piece of text to get through, and thus the films were a much needed (yet remarkably still dense) summary of the trilogy, that spared us having to actually learn Elvish to fully grasp the story.

Amazon
Extended Edition Blu Ray

Peter Jackson's the Lord of the Rings signified a landmark event in cinema history, and because of its success, studios were quick to green light a variety of other wizardry and sword and sandal styled epics for the big screen, whether they be historical or fantasy. So because of Lord of the Rings, inferior movies from Troy and Kingdom of Heaven to Harry Potter and The Chronicals of Narnia continue to be made to this very day, and with increasing frequency. Yet none of these derivatives can even come close to matching the excellence of The Lord of the Rings cinematic trilogy. However like the books, I personally still have not managed to reach the end of the Return of the King movie without falling asleep. Yet hopefully one day I will find out what happened to Frodo and The Ring in the end, and hopefully that day will be before The Hobbit (an adaption of The Lord of the Rings prequel) finally gets made...

The Arabic Booker Prize 2011: Who should have really won

2011-03-15T10:55:00.001+04:00

The largely uncritical The National and Gulf News recently ran pieces on this year's Arabic Booker prize nominees, and from their own mouths what it feels like to be shortlisted for their nominated work. In the end Mohammed Achaari and Raja Alem won, and I congratulate them... however if the judging panel had any taste in good literature, they would have chosen the two noted below to win this year.

For me, the best works nominated for 2011 are relevant to the times we live in and are examples of good fiction that are realistic, yet enjoyable, while allowing the reader to feel genuine empathy for their characters. Unlike one of this year's winners, the two nominated below succeeded in this respect, without having to be sensationalist, over the top nor controversial, seemingly for the sake of being controversial.

Bensalem Himmich on: My Tormentor.

"The writer can be aware of the situations happening around the world like in Guantanamo Bay, Abu Ghraib and lots of other Arab prisons," he says. "But we are not eyewitnesses to these events, so we have to create our own worlds and characters. Some readers may find some truth in this novel in relation to where they come from."

Miral Al-Tahawy on: Brooklyn Heights.

On her novel about Arab migrants in New York Al-Tahawy says the inspiration for the characters came from her time spent working in a Brooklyn refugee centre a decade ago. "It was a great professional and personal experience for me to read their case files and help them with their problems," she says.

Anyhoo ... congrats to them all, both nominated and those who won. The winners were announced in Abu Dhabi on Monday. The two authors will split the $50,000 cash prize between them, and will have their novels translated into English.

Tobe 'Poltergeist' Hooper to produce Emirati horror flick.

2011-03-09T21:07:00.001+04:00

Poltergeist

Yet another win for the UAE film industry, with yet another big budget feature set to be released in 2012. Legendary horror director Tobe Hooper, who bought us the original The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Stephen Spielberg's classic fantasy horror tale Poltergeist, has confirmed that his next movie will be set in the United Arab Emirates and called 'Djinn'.

This announcement comes literally weeks after the UAE's first homegrown big budget drama thriller, 2009's The City of Life, finally saw a DVD blu ray release, and after Tom Cruise had wrapped up filming a healthy chunk of the fourth Mission Impossible movie 'Ghost Protocol', set in Dubai. Like Djinn, Ghost Protocol is also slated for a 2012 release.

With the story likely to be set in Dubai, this horror thriller will follow a young Emirati couple who return home from the U.S. to discover that their new apartment in a luxury high-rise is built on the site of an abandoned fishing village, that is also home to some evil Djinn. Yes the story sounds like an Emirati remake of Poltergeist and Poltergeist 3 rolled into one, yet it should still be interesting to see a major Hollywood movie not only have an Arabic leading man and woman as its main protagonists, but also have these protagonists be Emirati.

The film has just gone into pre-production with Emirati director Nayla Al Khaja working as a cultural consultant for the feature. There is also official word that she is shadowing Hooper on the set and 'training' with him in preparation to 'helm her first feature length horror film', so in fact she maybe directing this film herself. You may remember I mentioned Ms. Khaja before in relation to her comedy short which was shown at the last Dubai International Film Festival, a film about a young Emirati couple on an awkward honeymoon in India.

About Djinn Hooper says:

'Simply put, this movie will scare everyone, no matter where you live or what you believe in.'

What will scare me is that by the time pre-production is complete, the script may have gone through some re-writes and all what we are left with is a movie about an American couple being haunted by a Djinn, just so an American audience can find the film a little more 'relatable' - after all, why do you think so many Japanese and European horror movies to date have been re-made with an American cast?

Oprah to film March episode of show from Cairo's Tahrir Sq

2011-03-04T15:51:00.006+04:00

African American entertainers show where they stand or fall in North Africa.

Al Arabiya today (March 4th) reported that Egypt's newly-appointed minister of tourism, Mounir Fakhry Abdel Nour, has announced a new initiative to bring the world’s most famous entertainers back to Egypt in an attempt to revive and boost the country’s tourism industry beaten after its unrest. Here he confirmed that Oprah Winfrey has accepted his official invitation to film a March episode of her show live from Tahrir Square, saying that she described the revolution as a 'great human achievement'. The show will discuss the #Jan25 events with Egyptian youths right on location in the center of Tahrir Square.

Updated: Oprah tweeted on Friday: “In bed with flu since Oscar show. Hearing reports that I'm taking show to Cairo. NOT TRUE. Have no plans to do so.” So why did Egypt's tourism minister say otherwise? Perhaps an explanation will be forthcoming in the next few days.

Meanwhile, while America's biggest female African American export is being invited to Cairo, two of its others are quietly distancing themselves from neighboring Libya's Qaddafi. In a manner akin to the fallout following Arabic RnB singer Tamer Hosny's public screw up in support of Mubarak during the #Jan25 protests, Beyonce and Mariah Carey are now denouncing 'Colonel' Qaddafi in a similar manner after earlier performing for his family at 'glitzy' New Years Eve parties.

Usher and Beyonce

Apparently 90s RnB superstars Beyonce, Carey and even Usher have all been payed huge amounts of money for performing at private parties hosted by Qaddafi family members, including his son Mutassim. However, since Qaddafi officially earned the 'Supervillain' status due to his quest to hold onto power via the spilling of the blood of his own people, these singers have now been embarrassed into turning their back on him - issuing public apologies to their fans and the Libyan people.

However while Beyonce has pledged to give the money she earned from him to charity, Carey has only thus far payed lip service of her disapproval of Qaddafi, calling him a 'vicious, crazy dictator' - but stopping short of actually turning over her earnings to charity. Meanwhile Usher Raymond has so far remained silent regarding his connections with the Libyan leadership. As a fellow blogger said, most of these US mainstream hip-hop and R&B singers are not consciously aware of things that happen beyond their own communities; thus become ignorant to the damage they are doing to others worldwide.

Although it is nice to see socially aware entertainers like Oprah Winfrey, Alicia Keys, Freeway and Wyclef Jean taking an immediate stand for what is right for their fans in the Middle East, it is sad that other entertainers persist in letting their ignorance get the best of them.

Egypt, Hollywood and Censorship

2011-02-27T09:53:00.009+04:00

The Matrix Reloaded: Banned in Egypt

With regime change coming as a result of freedom to tweet, freedom to use Facebook and freedom to voice descent, hopefully next on Egypt's list of 'freedoms', will be freedom to watch good cinema. Coming from a conservative culture such as my own, censorship of certain movies is an expected norm, especially when its content will quite obviously offend the sensibilities of the majority of the market it is shown in. However there are limits even this conservative-ish blogger can take, especially when it comes to the decisions made by the Egyptian Ministry for Arts and Culture over the past few years.

With Egypt's current transition to 'modernity', will we eventually see a media more open to less severe forms of censorship to seemingly inoffensive work? Will the public be able to choose for themselves what should and should not be shown in Egyptian cinemas? Well that may already be the case.

The blog Arabic Literature already focused on the subject of books and censorship, highlighting the opinion of Egyptian novelist Khaled al-Berry, a shortlisted contender for this year’s International Prize for Arabic Fiction, as saying:

'We have different forms of censorship in Egypt: political, religious, and moral... {This} means that even in absence of direct political censorship there are both religious and moral censorship. The politicians rested and relaxed and left the new forces doing their works. '

These forces have led to some of the biggest movies released in the last 10 years being banned in Egypt, three of which include The Prince of Egypt, The Matrix and The Da Vinci Code:

The Prince of Egypt.

One might ask, 'Why was this banned again?' given that the story of Moses is central to the faiths of all three major world religions (Islam, Judaism and Christianity). Keeping this fact in mind, Spielberg had obviously went out of his way not to offend anyone with this Disney-esque retelling of that prophet's life. However what he had done, was not enough to save it from Egypt's censors.

One of the reason's why this movie was banned, was apparently due to the reference to Rameses as the Pharaoh of the Exodus. As an ancient historical figure Rameses II is highly regarded in Egypt, and is widely believed by its academics to have been deceased prior to the events of the Hebrew enslavement and Exodus.

However the main reason for its censorship was due to modern religious concerns. It is a little known fact to those who do not practice the religion, that Islam not only condemns images of The Prophet Mohamed (sws) but there is also a prohibition about the physical representation of any of God's prophets (and even humans in general), as they can all become subject to idolitary. This reasoning not only led to Prince of Egypt being banned in the Maldives and Malaysia, but also in Egypt. Here it is worth noting the arbitrary censorship that occurs in the Muslim world when it comes to the portrayal of religious icons. It does not make sense why The Prophet Mohamed (sws) image should never be shown (and by extension Moses in Prince of Egypt), yet other movies like The Passion were still shown in theaters across the region.

The Matrix Reloaded

Although this movie should never have been made simply because it lacked the originality and heart of its predecessor The Matrix, this was not the reason why it was banned in Egypt. Madkour Thabit, the head of Egypt’s censorship body said. “There is no specific scene to which the committee objected [To the Matrix Reloaded] – it is about the movie as a whole,” However upon its release there was some official talk about the movie being too violent for its cinemas; yet the real reason was likely the result of confusion over its writers, The Walchoski Brothers, use of 'deep' religious iconography throughout the film and its 'promotion' of Judeo-Christian ideals. For example, 'Zion', a fictional underground location that was the last human city on Earth, was viewed at the time of the movie's release as comparable to Israel, chiefly because it had the name of 'Zion'. However to follow that line of reasoning would be to give the Walcholshi Brother's way too much credit. In all likely hood, they chose the name Zion, because it sounded 'cool' like other names in the Matrix series, such as 'Neo', 'Naiobi', 'Link' and 'Zee' etc.

A more likely reason why The Matrix Reloaded was banned, was probably due to one pivotal scene where The Architect, a 'god like' (notice the inverted commas) character is introduced. Some said this character's presence amounted to blasphemy as he was believed to literally represent God, however this cannot be further from the truth. The Architect was in fact an advanced computer program put into human form, that built the fictional reality of the Matrix, and who unfortunately during his 5 minutes of on screen time, explains in the most incoherent and complicated manner possible the very simple nature of the Matrix. This sequence perhaps caused the movie's censors brain's to overload and promptly shut down. Upon recovery, and wishing to act quickly and on the side of caution, they elected to ban the film, instead of bothering to give it any more thought.

The Da Vanci Code

Amazon

Following the banning of the book The Da Vanci Code, it was only expected that the movie would follow suit. According to Archbishop Hanna Nour, The Secretary general of the Jordanian Council of Churches, the movie was banned in Jordan and Egypt because it “harms Christian and Muslim religious symbols by calling into question what is written in the Gospels and the Koran on the personality of Christ,” which is a fair enough assertion. However I would have also added that any film that feature's Tom Hanks as an action hero, as reason enough not to not show it anywhere..

The movie faced harsh opposition world wide, due to its 'blasphemous' and over the top premise that seemed based upon Michael Baigent, Richard Leigh, and Henry Lincoln's 'factual' conspiracy bestseller The Holy Blood and the Holy Grail, a novel that links Free Masonary with Jesus fathering a child and a Catholic conspiracy; all amounting to a piece of work that could almost (but not quite) be comparable to Salman Rushdie's very ill conceived and idiotic Satan Verses.

However offending religious sensitivities is not the only issue at hand. While religion played a part in the banning of The Da Vanci Code, The Matrix, and Prince of Egypt, another notable and considerably older movie based on former Egyptian President Anwar Sadat also faced the wrath of Egypt's censors.

Sadat

Amazon

For the past 30 years, there have been many stories floating around specifying the 'real reason' why this US made biopic of the assassinated President Anwar Sadat was banned in Egypt. Rumor has it that the film was banned due to the casting of an African American actor (Louis Gosset Jnr, of Iron Eagle fame) in the role of an Arab leader, forcing a 'colour conscious' Egyptian Government to reject the film on grounds of historical inaccuracies - despite the fact that Sadat himself was part Sudanese. This reason has never been verified as true, as the source for this explanation came from The New York Times, and no one officially from The Egyptian Government had actually made any specific mention of Gosset's skin tone. Today, many young Egyptians have argued that this may not have even been the case, and the issue was far more complicated than mere casting issues... but who knows? What is officially known is that the drama's other vague 'historical inaccuracies' were too grave, too many and too political to be shown in Egypt's cinemas. Since then however, the film has been unbanned.

Of course with Egypt being the biggest maker of Arabic movies, several of its own films have inevitably been banned in its own country. Egyptian American actor Sayed Badreya highlights in his documentary and website 'Saving Egyptian Classics', movies that remain banned by Farouk Hosni, the then Minister of Culture, movies which were made decades before the digital revolution and have since then been left to rot in store houses across Egypt, never to be preserved and seen again.

Meanwhile in a stunning case of life imitating art imitating life, the cheesy 2008 Egyptian comedy Ramy Al Eatsamy, found itself banned due to its controversial storyline where a young man attempts to establish a "Facebook" group on the Internet to organize Sit-ins, in protest of the conditions and circumstances facing the country. I guess when all is said and done, The Egyptian Ministry of Culture's fears seem to have come true, because on January 25th 2011, the plot of Ramy Al Eatsamy happened for real. It seems that decades of censorship could not prevent the inevitable.

Speaking of the #Jan25 protests, Jordanian-born author Fadia Faqir said: “We had a psychological barrier – what I call ‘the policeman inside us’. That policeman was killed” on Tahrir Square. The mental hurdle that inhibited free expression “has been totally destroyed for all of us – whether in Jordan, Yemen, Saudi Arabia or Egypt”.

Now that homegrown regime change has taken place, maybe Egypt can take a more open minded, measured and less arbitrary approach to censorship, akin to what we have here in the UAE. Without a doubt, censorship and self censorship of some material will always be necessary, but hopefully no longer to the limits and extremes we have seen so far.

Inspirational Movies: Revisiting Stephen King's 'The Mist'

2011-02-10T15:30:00.004+04:00

Stephen King's movies have a tendency to suck and as a result his film adaptations have a tendency to go straight to video, or even worse, straight to SyFy. This is partly due to uncreative writing and direction on behalf of the movie makers and partly because Stephen King is not exactly that great of an author. However when he does get a story right, it tends to go down in modern literary history as one of the best that genre has to offer. Furthermore his films like Stand By Me and Apt Pupil show the range and depth of quality this writer can produce when teamed with a capable director. However there is one director who truly knows how to bring King's works to life, and that is Frank Darabont, the creative might behind The Mist.

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Discussing the themes of 'hope' and 'fear' in times of unrelenting pressure, director Darabont's third adaptation of a Stephen King novel dealing with the subject, (following The Green Mile and The Shawshank Redemption) goes above and beyond its way to drive home another positive message, but this time in the most 'nihilistic' and tragic way conceivable.

Despite it being a modern trend to make movies as dark and as bleak as possible, Darabont has always been an optimist. The Shawshank Redemption, The Green Mile and The Mist are three of Stephen King's best movies to date, and thus have all surpassed the original books in terms of greatness. As testament to the quality of these films, The Shawshank Redemption and The Green Mile have not only courted Oscar recognition, but have also literally been ranked as two of the greatest movies of all time. Although The Mist was not critically accepted in the same way, it is still considered as one of the best horror movies ever made. Its now famous twist ending that many have called 'cruel and heartless', to me is actually 'life affirming and positive'.

The Mist is a morality play following the exploits of a group of shoppers trapped in a supermarket after a mysterious fog descends on their town. When it becomes apparent that blood thirsty creatures exist in this mist, the affects of fear and ignorance quickly becomes the greatest danger to the shoppers' survival, far surpassing the very real threat of the creatures outside. The subject of 'fear' and how it can warp a person's sense of rationality and reality is the key theme of this tale.

In this story the world of these characters has been transformed into a literal hell that is also allegorical in nature. For me this movie's famously 'cruel' ending, helps deliver a powerful and timely message of the power of 'hope'. The allegory here is about finding one's true self when enduring a storm of trouble, and never giving up in the face of that adversity, even if it appears that the whole world has been destroyed as a result of that problem. Without spoiling the ending (too much), Darabont's point is to illustrate that no matter how many levels of hell a person feels they have fallen in to, giving up and succumbing to fear should never be an option... Like the characters in this film, personal circumstances may seem bleak beyond any realistic hope of positive resolve, but as in real life, what one sees, is often never the whole picture...

Intelligent and insightful, yet violent and challenging, The Mist can make a good companion piece to Andrew Niccol's Gattaca, as well as being the flip-side of the same coin of The Shawshank Redemption, delivering a life affirming message that requires the audience to look beyond its dark ending to see the underlining positive message of holding on to hope, even when all seems lost.

Bad Language: Very Strong.
Sex and Nudity: None.
Violence: Very Strong.

A guide to Arabs, Muslims and Science Fiction

2011-01-21T13:55:00.076+04:00

There is a joke where The Iranian Ambassador to the UN, who had just finished giving a speech, walked out into the lobby where he met President Bush. They shook hands, and as they walked the Iranian said, "You know, I have just one question about what I have seen in America."

President Bush said, "Well, anything I can do to help you, I will."

The Iranian whispered "My son watches this show Star Trek and in it there is Chekhov who is Russian, Scotty who is Scottish, and Sulu who is Chinese, but no Iranians. My son is very upset and doesn't understand why there aren't any Middle Easterners on Star Trek." President Bush laughed, leaned toward the Iranian ambassador, and whispered back, "It's because it takes place in the future."

Pitch Black

In 1965 Gene Roddenberry cast African American actress Nichelle Nichols as the character Uhura on his groundbreaking show Star Trek, a ground breaking casting decision that helped influence modern Western history. Sometime afterwards African American characters began regularly appearing throughout entertainment and the sci-fi genre, but typically as the ‘token black’ often taking notable but secondary roles in movies. It was not until the mid 90s where again Star Trek broke new ground by casting its first African American starship captain to lead its franchise, while roughly around that same time Will Smith took the leading role in one of the biggest Sci-fi movies ever made, Independence Day. It had taken 40 years to reach this point where there was finally an acknowledgment that black people may actually exist in the future, and with a greater role to play that goes beyond the ‘token black’ or ‘trusted side-kick’.

However what can be said about Middle Eastern characters? Would we actually see the day when a major sci-fi film or show have an Egyptian, Emirati or Saudi as its main protagonist? LOST did break new ground by having an Iraqi character take top billing in its ensemble lineup, but as with many things, that show was an exception to the rule. Hopefully, it does not take another 40 years before we see more Middle Eastern characters like Sayed from LOST as well as the ones listed below, become the norm.

Star Trek: Deep Space 9

DS9 on Amazon

Over the past 40 years the Star Trek franchise has gone out of its way to feature characters that do not fit the typical Caucasian profile. Its dark and comparatively grim 90’s spin-off show Deep Space 9, not only featured the franchise's first Black Captain as the series' lead character, but it also introduced its first ever Middle Eastern character named Dr. Julian Bashir, played by British/Sudanese actor Alexander Saddiq. Although those unfamiliar with East African/Middle Eastern peoples may not have immediately clicked onto Bashir's ethnicity (despite having a distinctively Arabic name such as Bashir), it was soon made clear that the character is indeed of Arab origin when we are introduced to his parents Richard and Amsha Bashir, played by Israeli Lebanese actor Brian George and Egyptian American academic Fadwa El Guindi respectively.

Alexander Siddig noted the difficulties the casting directors had with finding an actress to play Amsha, by stating that there are very few Muslim actresses in the West who fitted the part. Fadwa El Guindi is not an actress herself, however she still played the role very well .The inclusion of her character underscored the maturity of the show and its writers, where there was an explicit wish to show that Arabs do exist in the future as normal regular individuals, while never dwelling on their ethnicity explicitly or subtly within the confines of the story itself.

On a side note, it is also interesting to point out that at that same time, Deep Space 9’s less sophisticated sister show, Star Trek: Voyager, also saw Jordanian King Abdullah in his first and last ever acting role as a random background science officer onboard the USS Voyager. Speaking of the then Prince Abdullah, Voyager executive producer Jeri Taylor commented, "Take away the title and the trappings, and at the core you have a Star Trek fan."

Battlestar Galactica: Caprica

Although not Muslim, the characters of this short lived drama do have Arabic names (and perhaps to non-Brown people, even look Middle Eastern). However, even though the characters are well rounded, three dimensional and are more or less pleasant, critics have noted that the show’s creators seem to have gone out of their way to make them seem 'exotic' and significantly different from their white/'European' counterparts. As with most American prime time shows, the portrayal of 'Middle Eastern type' characters often tends to carry a baggage of exoticism with it. From 24 to NCIS to even a quality show like Caprica, those of Middle Eastern descent always seem to have an ‘alien’ (no pun intended) feel to their presence, in order to emphasize ‘difference’, or 'the other'. One blogger even referred to Caprica's portrayal of 'Middle Eastern characters', as a form of neo-orientalism:

Caprica on Amazon

"Its entire premise is based on Latent Orientalism. The most interesting manifestation of orientalism on Caprica is the antagonistic portrayals of the Caprican colony (the West) and its diametric counterparts Tauron (civilizational home of the protagonists Samand Yusef Adama (uncle, and father of Battle Star Galactica protagonist William Adama) and Gemenon which represent static, primeval civilisations."

Although his assessment continues to link the show to classical orientalist representations typically found in more common forms of text both fictional and academic, it is worth noting that Caprica's architect Ronald D. Moore, is also responsible for the creation of Star Trek Deep Space 9 and it's character Dr. Julian Bashir, an individual who's ethnic 'otherness' was never once highlighted or referenced to in that show's entire 7 year run.

Pitch Black and The Chronicles of Riddick.

Amazon Blu ray

The sci-fi horror Pitch Black and its sci-fi fantasy sequel The Chronicles of Riddick is perhaps the only major studio sci-fi franchise to feature Middle Eastern Muslim characters who also actively practice their faith. Furthermore its portrayal of Muslims goes way beyond the stereotypes normally seen in Hollywood, by showing the practice of the religion in an overwhelmingly positive light. Ignoring the fact that many of these Muslim characters within the series ultimately met sticky endings at the hands (or claws) of terrifying aliens, the Riddick series does go out of its way to show Muslims as not only regular people, but the Islamic religion as a peaceful and positive force.

Fans have even caught director David Twohy’s solution for space fairing Muslims of the future who maybe conflicted about which direction to face when praying, by suggesting that they pray in an inwards circle... which was cute. Let’s hope with Chronicles of Riddick 2 (or Pitch Black 3) Twohy continues to go against the Hollywood grain and feature more characters like these.

LOST

LOST introduced the world to everyone’s favorite ex Republican Guard, Sayid Hassan Jarah. Although this character was played by an Indian actor who does not look even remotely Iraqi, it came as a pleasant surprise to see a well rounded Arab character portrayed on a mainstream popular sci-fi show. Akin to the characters in the Chronicles of Riddick, Sayid is shown openly practicing his faith in a non-threatening manner; merely as a means for personal enlightenment and peace of mind.

Furthermore, never once does Sayid come across as the 'exotic other', even though his initial appearance on the doomed flight in the first episode intentionally evoked memories of the 9/11 attacks and just about every cliche a person may associate between an Arab and a plane crash. However what would have made his, and every other Arab/Muslim character on the show better, would be to show them as truly regular and unremarkable human beings; individuals whose lives (like most regular Arabs and Muslims) are as far removed from the contexts of the Gulf War and terrorism, as like millions of other people world wide. Perhaps the show’s creators felt that Americans can only comprehend the existence of an Arab character, if they can find a recognizable point of reference to associate him or her with.

On a positive note, Wikipedia provides a solid roundup of Sayid Jarah’s character's arc within the broader themes of this show and his personal relationship with God and Islam over the course of its first three seasons. Here is part of it:

"Sayid was seen practicing Islam on and off the Island with different mindsets. Hence, comes its importance in portraying his Faith Journey. Prior to the crash, a flashback of Sayid revealed his employment of praying as a means of approaching Essam, to fulfill the task he was blackmailed into by the CIA. His desire to claim Essam’s body to provide a proper Islamic burial delayed his flight, causing him to board the fated Flight 815. Furthermore, during his time on the Island, Sayid was seen on the Sailboat praying again, this time, however, as a means of connecting to God, to strengthen his faith and attain a spiritual support, before what could be a deadly confrontation with the Others."

A Mosque Among The Stars

Amazon

This anthology of stories compiled by Muhammad Aurangzeb Ahmad and Ahmed A. Khan, is a collection of 12 science fiction stories that have an Islamic element to them: Each story written by authors from different religious and cultural backgrounds, either feature a key Muslim character, a main character who is Muslim or a setting that is entirely Islamic.

I have included this book here because it is the only collection of science fiction short stories that has a focus on Middle Eastern elements in one way or another. The two most notable stories from this selection include 'A Walk Through the Garden' a sci-fi horror story set in war torn Iraq, following a platoon of American soldiers who somehow find themselves in a realized version of an Islamic hell, and "Cultural Clashes in Cadiz" a story featuring time travelers from the future during the Moorish-Christian wars of the past.

- At this point I would like to give an honorable mention to Michael Crichton's The 13th Warrior, (originally known as 'Eater of the Dead'). Although it is not connected to this anthology in anyway, it is perhaps one of the best pieces of popular literature set in 'Arabia' within the sci-fi genre.-

The Objective.

Amazon DVD

This finally leads us to the low budget horror flick The Objective. Easily the worst piece of work in this guide, it is also a fun little feature. What starts of as a psychological horror about a platoon of US soldiers who end up in a mission to hell within the mountains of Afghanistan via an adventure that is half Joseph Conrad's Heart of Darkness, and a little more than half Lucius Shepard's A Walk Through the Garden, quickly ascends purely into the realm of sci-fi with a rather cool twist ending.

Although the film lays layer upon layer of Hollywood-ized Islamic mysticism complete with sword wielding Djinns and nonsensical quasi Islamic chants that mimic the adhan (just to add to that 'exotic' feel), the conclusion of the story is both shocking and rewarding, despite clumsily walking a thin line between The Blair Witch Project and an episode of the X-Files. Even though the story is not Middle Eastern in any way, nor does it focus on any of the Muslim characters who featured in it (who were actually quite cringe worthy to watch anyway), The Objective is still unique due to its off key mix of Islamic folk-law, horror and science fiction.

As a final thought, it is worth highlighting that the one thing all of these movies, books and shows have in common, is that they are not written or produced by Arabs or Muslims. So the question as to why we do not produce our own quality adult sci-fi (and by 'quality' and 'adult', I cannot refer to the Malaf Al Mostakbal series) is a subject for another post.

Updated: For further reading Apex Magazine November 2010–Issue 18 has a special edition devoted to Arab and Muslim sci-fi (Thanks to Arablit for highlighting) .

James Bond vs Ethan Hunt in Dubai.

2011-01-17T22:09:00.003+04:00

Shortly after the announcement that the cinematic franchise for James Bond staring Danial Craig will finally go ahead, author Jeffery Deaver this week announced that the next James Bond novel, due to be released in May, will be set in the United Arab Emirates, specifically Dubai. Under the unassuming title of Carte Blanche, Jeffery Deaver said he was inspired to set the novel here after visiting the Emirates Airline Festival of Literature.

"When I thought about the setting for the new book I thought immediately about Dubai," he said, "Not only is it an incredibly fun, wonderful and exhilarating place but it retains at its heart an exotic core." said Deaver

It is slightly suspicious that Carte Blanche is set in the same emirate as Tom Cruise's Mission Impossible IV: Ghost Protocol, when up until now the UAE has totally been ignored by the Bond franchise since its inception. It seems that the Ian Flemming estate who commissioned Jeffery Deaver to pen the latest novel, are now viewing the Mission Impossible franchise as a serious contender to its own, especially since its latest director Brad Bird, has already shown the potential and flare to make his very own 007 styled movie, as seen with the 1960s/70s Bond influenced The Incredibles.

James Bond Novel Collection on Amazon

James Bond Movie Collection on Amazon

David Fincher's The Social Network (Review)

2011-01-15T21:14:00.003+04:00

Here's a quick post about what I consider one of the best movies of 2010: The Social Network. Now what I write may sound like unabashed 'fanboyism', but in my opinion David Fincher is not capable of making a 'bad movie'. It seems the worst he can do is a 'slightly above average movie', as all of his films to date have been excellent - bar the overlong Benjamin Button and the slightly overrated Fight Club, both falling under the category of 'average'. Thus the guy who bought us such classics as Se7en and The Game, has delivered yet another winner with The Social Network, a film which in the hands of any other director would have most likely come across as little more than 'Facebook: The Movie'.

Amazon Blu-ray

This story charting the mildly interesting rise of Facebook creator Mark Zuckerberg, never gets dull due to Jesse Eisenberg's portrayal of him and Alan (The West Wing) Sorkin's sparkling and witty script, that delivers brilliant one liners, like the now infamous Tyler Winklevoss quote : 'I'm six-five, 220 pounds, and there are two of me.' ... a character who happens to be one half of this movie's muscular twin antagonists. Sure, in the real world I doubt the real Zukerberg and every significant individual in his life possess the sharp vocal wit of Sorkin's interpretation of them, but thats what Hollywood is here for - to make the ordinary look and sound amazing, and under Fincher's tight direction, he succeeds.

The one and only issue I have with this film is its portrayal of women. For the most part (with the exception of three women) all of The Social Network's female characters come across as 'hoes' with little to zero integrity. This portrayal maybe an example of Sorkin's world view, or just a reflection of Zukerberg's experience and perception of the young women that surrounds him, be they Ivy League educated or not. Either way, this film goes to show that even in the 21st Century, neither money or education can buy a person class, and Hollywood, (even in a David Fincher film) loves to exploit this fact by providing any excuse to show girls taking off their clothes or/and making out with each other, for seemingly no reason except to titillate men *coughs The Black Swan*.

This week this film finally saw its Blu Ray release. I have never been a fan of Blu Ray because in reality (and we should all admit it) there is little visual difference between it and a HD DVD, however David Fincher's style is always a visual treat, and thus looks exceptionally good on Blu Ray, making it a definite buy. Amongst other extras, it also features commentaries with Fincher and Sorkin (which are quite good), as well as a four-part making-of documentary (which is not so good). Overall its a solid 8/10.

Does the UAE really have the potential to make good films?

2011-01-04T21:18:00.002+04:00

Apparently an Emirati version of Indiana Jones will soon go into preproduction in the UAE under the title of 'Abdulla Omar and the Lost Sand City'. The project which was originally announced in 2009, will tell the story of a 'bedouin James Bond' type who travels the world looking for ancient relics and artifacts in search of a lost city, etc... With this 'face palming' premise that I hope will be better on screen than on paper, I can sincerely say with all my heart that what the UAE film industry needs right now are films with integrity and not gimmicks.

Since the industry is still in its birthing stage, 'creativity' and 'originality' at this point are vital ingredients to its growth, not recycled 'regionalized' versions of stories that have already been told before in Hollywood. Maybe at a later stage, where we have gained a more established foothold within the international film industry, gimmicky movies like 'Abdulla Omar' can also have their place amongst more serious efforts such as 'City of Life'. However until then, the country should continue to make 'serious' movies that can further garner it recognition on the international film award circuit, and not attempt to generate regional mass appeal that only have a limited possibility to realistically cross over to an international audience. Yes we have demonstrated that the UAE can produce slick big budget movies, but no, that does not mean we should just throw suitcases of money at the big screen in order to produce the next hit. The last time I checked, there have already been hundreds of Indiana Jones type movies made, and most, if not all of those clones sucked.

However it is not all potentially bad news for the industry. If the last 12 months are anything to go by, the next 10 years will see the growth of many new and distinctly original films coming from our new directors. It was only three years ago that 2007 saw the first full length Emirati film released under the name of Al Hilm (The Dream). Distinctively art house but clever in it metaphors, the story about a group of frustrated actors and directors wandering aimlessly in the desert trying to make a movie, quite aptly symbolized the state of the UAE film industry at that time. Since then a slowly growing number of productions have been produced.Yet despite producing nothing close to the quantity of movies as seen in other Arabian film markets, the quality and the potential for growth is here.

Although with each annual Dubai and Abu Dhabi Film Festival we see a growing selection of talented young individuals producing quality short movies, the truth is is that not all of them are going to be good enough (or even want to) take their talent internationally and to the big screen. There are only a handful out of this few -whom in my opinion - will have the potential to be the next David Fincher, Christopher Nolan or Stephen Spielberg... like the three listed below:

Despite being only 28 years old, Ali F. Mostafa is no doubt perhaps the biggest Emirati film maker to date. His movie City of Life is officially the first ever 'home grown big budget' feature to come out of the Arabian Gulf, and despite experiencing issues regarding its distribution (a seemingly common problem surrounding Arab movies looking to ‘cross over’ into other language markets both internationally and locally) the film has become both a critical and commercial success. His second feature is slated to be a comedy road movie set between Abu Dhabi and Beirut, a project he refers to as a “cross between Little Miss Sunshine and The Hangover", and produced by Abu Dhabi media house TwoFour54. Whether or not it will be as good as his first feature 'City of Life' remains to be seen, and although the concept of a comedy pan-Arab road movie can easily be a conceptual hit or miss, the yearning for more movies set within the UAE made by established quality Emirati film directors, should guarantee its success upon its release regardless.

Coming in hot off the heels of Ali F. Mustafa is the 24 year old former fashion model - turned film director, Abdulla Al Kaabi. Last month he shocked everyone during the Dubai International Film Festival by casting Jean Reno (yes that Jean Reno) in his debut short film 'The Philosopher'. The film is based on ‘Baggio's Story’, a short tale originally written by Charlie Fish, about a man determined to give up everything he owns, but finding out it is not as easy as it seems.

This Paris based director's next movie is set to be a full length feature produced by Oursin Films, and may probably be the second or third big budget movie to come out of the UAE within the next two years or so. Speaking about its concept he said ‘We are in the early stage ... and I am very excited to share it with you once everything is clear. But you can imagine how big this project is going to be if our short film was this big.’

One of the more innovative directors who I suspect will also be big in the next decade is Rashid Al Marri. The summer of 2010 saw him gather and film a group of individuals who wanted to travel to Palestine to show their solidarity with its people, but were unable to make that journey. So instead they elected to communicate with them via other means, i.e the old school method of writing letters. The end result was the 37-minute feature 'Letters to Palestine’; an obvious reference and probable companion piece to Ghassan Abdullah and Kenneth Ring’s infamous book Letters from Palestine.

Most famously known for his short comedy feature The Mandoobs, Marri’s Letters to Palestine, a story essentially about UAE residents questioning their connection with those living in the occupied territories, is a serious, touching and mature documentary movie with a cinematic feel, where he poses the question ‘does "out of sight" really mean out of mind?’ If any director has the potential to make it big, it will be this guy as he has shown originality, diversity and creativity in his film making process, and it is these qualities that will help the UAE film industry grow.

6 Sequels You Have To See in 2011 and 6 You Should Avoid

2010-12-30T15:58:00.009+04:00

'When there is no more originality in Hollywood, sequels will walk the earth.' 2010 was a rather mediocre year for originality, with only a handful of movies released not being a remake, spin off or sequel. 2011 looks to continue that trend. The calendar of movies for the next 12 months seems to consist of a mixed bag of good franchise flix and tired sequels; thus below are the 6 must see and must avoid sequels that you should keep an eye on.

Scream 4

The Must See

Caesar: Rise of the Apes

The last Planet of the Apes that featured Mark Wahlberg and Helen Bonham Carter came with a time-traveling twist ending that seemingly made no sense to the most of us. Hopes for a sequel providing an explanation might come in this prequel staring James Franco. However there is a chance that this Rupert Wyatt feature may totally retcon Tim Burton's film and ignore those events. But who cares? The source material is strong enough to make any Planet of the Apes movie a successful must see hit.

Fast Five

Amazon Blu Ray

The Fast and the Furious movies are not exactly known for quality, but who cares? As long as it features nice cars, that will be enough to keep the masses entertained. Now to enjoy this movie forget about the recycled storyline that this franchise keeps on churning out for each sequel, and just watch for those cars. For me, The Fast and the Furious movies are nothing more than American version of Top Gear thats tripped out on Acid, with a hip hop soundtrack and muscle cars.

Mission: Impossible 4 — Ghost Protocol

I have covered the Dubai segment of the filming of this sequel in great depth on this blog already, and who can blame me? MI:4 has gotten most residents of the UAE who are fans of the franchise, excited about the next Tom Cruise hit. With much of it set in Dubai in an around locations that to the rest of world may seem amazing and exotic, but for us living here are nothing more than ordinary, it will be nice to see the emirate up on the big screen in all its Hollywood glitz and glam. Furthermore with Brad Bird (the director of the James Bond inspired The Incredibles) at its helm, the film is sure to be an improvement over the average MI:3 and the insipid MI:2.

Scream 4

The Scream Trilogy revolutionized the horror genre during the 90s and the last decade by both parodying and paying homage to it. This funny but violent comedy horror series took all the horror movie norms from the 80s, turned them on their heads and made a highly original series of movies. Scream 4 is expected to be the first in a new trilogy of films for the new decade and judging from the trailer, it seems like it will be sticking to the formula of lots of laughs and buckets of blood. Let’s just hope Sydney survives yet again, or I shall not bother with Scream 5 and 6.

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides

Even though the movies are very well made, I have never been a fan of the Pirates franchise. Yet despite being slightly boring, the last Pirates of the Caribbean was epic in scale, story and effects. Thus it was inevitable that after it blew up at the box office Disney quickly put into production yet another sequel, even though part three was meant to be the finale. Personally I am only watching part 4 out of a morbid curiosity to see if the film can survive without Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley, and of course to see Johnny Depp and Penelope Cruise back on the big screen together again.

The Thing

John Carpenter's The Thing is perhaps one of the most violent, gory and horrific sci-fi movies I have ever seen, period. It is also considered as a classic of modern cinema. Because it has taken Hollywood nearly 30 years to come up with this prequel set literally seconds before the first movie began, it deserves to be seen whether it will be good or bad. I just wish that they thought of a different title for it. I mean could they have not called it The Thing 2, or The Thing Zero? Just saying...

The Must Avoid

5inal Destination

The first Final Destination came hot off the heels of Scream 2 in both timing and originality. Unfortunately like most franchise movies, all of its sequels lacked any originality to the point of being offensively repetitive. With Final Destination 2, 3 and 4, gone were the fun, excitement and thrill of watching a group of teenagers trying to outwit death (and the FBI), and all that was left were a catalogue of sadistic and over the top ways nice people can die in freak accidents. This fifth installment is likely to be more of the same, that instead of trying to expand on the mythology of the first movie, will again just settle for a 'how many different ways can a human be sliced, diced, disembowelled, blown up, crushed, punctured or decapitated, before the viewer watching will actually require psychological help?' type of movie.

Ice Age: Continental Drift

I have never understood the popularity of the Ice Age movies. They lack the charm of a traditional Disney cartoon, and the originality and maturity of the Pixar movies, yet for some reason they remain a success. Ray Romano, Queen Latifah, John Leguizamo and Denis Leary again providing the voices of the Manny, Ellie, Sid and Diego characters - who if my history teacher was correct - should all be extinct and fossilized by now (the characters, not the actors).

Transformers 3: The Dark of the Moon

Amazon Blu Ray

Ever wandered what watching paint dry while someone loudly banged two tin dustbin lids over your head - for over two hours - would be like? Watch Transformers 2 and find out. The original Michael Bay Transformers was a fun, warm feature that paid homage to the cartoons, comics and toys in an affectionate manner. However its mind numbingly boring yet noisy sequel was just a CGI mess with way too many explosions, inappropriate scenes of sexuality and cringe worthy racist stereotypes. Yes, for me watching this film was like watching my childhood get raped by a crack junkie, without a condom ...

However to Bay's credit, at least Megan Fox was dropped from the cast of Transformers 3 shortly after filming commenced. Yet, I am still going to pass on it upon its release, and will instead probably just watch the classic original 1986 movie staring Orson Wells and Lenard Nimoy.

Big Momma’s House: Like Father, Like Son

Don't call me a ‘homophobe’ or a ‘racist’, but African American men in drag are just way too disturbing to watch. Yet, and for some strange reason, they continue to remain a box office draw. I mean how else could Tyler Perry be the billionaire that he is? Martin Lawrence's penchant for dressing up in women's clothing is also making him a rich man, but does he really think he can be third time lucky in what seems to be an exact rehash of the two previous movies?

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1

There was a time when the modern vampire was a truly scary creature. Interview with a Vampire and Blade are two very different examples of what a frightening vampire movie should be like. And even though Buffy turned the genre in to a comedy teen angst ridden affair that mixed love, violence and high school woes into one TV show, it still remained brutal and at times disgustingly grotesque. Unfortunately all of that changed with the arrival of the Twilight Series. Since then, just about every other vampire movie and TV show made today has been aimed at a young teenage girl demographic, who are more concerned with things that sparkle and less with things that bleed.

Justin Bieber: Never Say Never

Ok, this is neither a sequel or a prequel, but it is a Justin Bieber movie. For me thats more than a good reason why this film should be avoided.

DC Comics under fire for creating an 'Algerian Batman'

2010-12-26T19:56:00.002+04:00

I figure DC Comics knew what they were getting themselves into when they created Nightrunner, its first ‘home grown’ Arab superhero. Detective Comics Annual #12 this month introduced a new character named Bilal, a French national of Algerian origin who is now the 'Batman of France' as part of Batman Incorporated.

For your quick information, Batman Inc is the way DC's writers are now franchising the superhero's war on crime internationally within the confines of the comics. Here Bruce Wayne recruits and trains an international host of superheroes to both represent him and his war against crime, and to represent themselves and the respective countries they are fighting for. But here rests the problem in the real world. Under the banner of 'sharp analysis' and 'blunt commentary' The Astute Bloggers (a Right Wing Zionist blog), have kicked up a large-ish internet stink (and a barrel of free promotion for DC Comics), over the creation of 'Bilal' and his alter-ego 'Nightrunner', accusing the comic book publisher of being naive liberals. Amongst other bigoted slurs they say:

Bruce Wayne recruits an Algerian Muslim living in France, in Clichy-Sous-Bois, where the Muslim riots grew out of in 2005, over the death of 2 delinquents who electrocuted themselves by stupidly entering a power station, and the blame was laid upon at least 2 policemen who weren't even at fault and didn't even know they were there. How about that, Bruce Wayne goes to France where he hires not a genuine French boy or girl with a real sense of justice, but rather, an "oppressed" minority who adheres to the Religion of Peace. And this is a guy whose very parents were murdered at the hands of a common street thug!

In this loaded statement we learn that French Algerians are not really 'French' per se. They are Arabs with French passports, and of course being Algerian they are probably prone to committing the odd terrorist attack or two, in between committing petty crimes, because it is in their nature.

Amazon:
Detective Comics #12

After 9/11 occurred there was an automatic international backlash against Muslims and Arabs. But then as the dust settled, many rational people sought to bridge cultures and religions by making an effort to understand each other. Today, although we are still a long way from any real understanding between the East and the West, at least there are people (and organizations) amongst us who are trying to bridge that gap, whether for moral, social or financial gains.

Not only does the creation of Nightrunner give Arab kids a new Superhero role-model who is not a white Caucasian American, but it also broadens DC's reader base, automatically increasing revenue for them by recognizing an untapped market that the comic book powerhouse can exploit: The Middle East.

However this is not the first time DC have featured Arab Muslim superheroes. Nightrunner's appearance comes hot of the tail of the introduction of Kuwaiti Naif Al Muttawa's superhero troop The99. Recently this team of Muslim superheros teamed up with The Justice League of America in a crossover issue that unfortunately elicited a similar controversy.

Within entertainment there has always been a general resistance to representing Muslims and Arabs outside the clichéd frame of being that exotic and mysterious 'Other'; generally preferring to represent us as a variation of either a terrorist, an oppressed and conflicted minority or an over sexualized decadent sheik. However slowly but surely, more positive, or should I say more 'regular' representations of Middle Easterners, are beginning to make a greater presence within Western entertainment, even within the fantasy genre. 'Dr. Julian Bashir' from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine is one (and unfortunately only one) that immediately comes to mind; but with the creation of Nightrunner, I am sure there will be others to come.

Caprica. The death of intelligent television

2010-12-25T12:10:00.009+04:00

After watching a ten year old forced to shoot his father after seeing his mother beaten and killed by soldiers, I knew that there would never be another sci-fi show like Caprica - that dared to be this risky and intelligent for a long time to come. This slow gruelling character drama that can best be described as the sci-fi equivalent to Mad Men was doomed from the start because of its focus on human interaction and motivation and less on space fights and explosions. Thus it was of no surprise that this Battlestar Galactica spin-off was recently cancelled midway through its first season; the latest victim in the general dumbing down of popular entertainment that is increasingly geared towards generating mass appeal and not quality and original storytelling.

Although I enjoyed the original show's reruns as a child during the 80's I could never consider the original 1970s Battlestar Galactica as an example of quality television. From what I remember, it was little more than a poor man's Star Wars and was as far as you can get from the type of sci-fi I had become accustomed to reading at a very young age, in the books of Arthur C. Clark and Isaac Asimov.

When television producer Ronald D. Moore's dark vision for Star Trek: Voyager was trashed, and his obligations towards Star Trek: Deep Space Nine were completed, he took the opportunity to take the old Battlestar Galactica TV show and remodel it for a modern audience. Battlestar Galactica was what Moore's Star Trek: Voyager was originally intended to be: a gritty, dark, contemporary and realistic drama about a nomadic group of people flying across the stars, trying to find their home. He was given free rein to do what he wanted to do with the franchise, and it was a success. His retelling of humanity's war with the robots known as Cylons spawned several generic one off shows that finally led to the prequel series Caprica.

Caprica was Moore's vision of Battlestar Galactica (and sci-fi in general) taken to its furthest extreme in adult maturity. It was the type of sci-fi that one would only find in serious novels and not prime time television. Here the emphasis was on the characters and their motivations while the more obvious sci-fi aspects such as alien worlds and killer robots, were just tools to help move the character's stories along. Of course such an approach - regardless of the quality of writing and acting - would ultimately doom the show. Battlestar Galactaca was a sci-fi action show about a war that destroys humanity, thus ultimately aimed at a younger male demographic who watched for the 'action and adventure'. Caprica, its prequel show examining the origins of that war, was a drama with little to no sci-fi element in it and because of its more serious themes regarding death, family, corporate politics and religion being the primary focus of its story, many Battlestar fans were just not that interested.

The story basically followed the conflict between two influential families on the planet of Caprica, whose fates are drawn together when their young daughters die in a terrorist attack. The series examined in quite lengthy detail the subjects of mortality and morality; typically doing so in several shades of grey. What made this show so interesting is that the viewer knows that each seemingly insignificant word, action or decision made by all of the principle characters, would eventually lead to an epic war 60 years later. Furthermore its representation of race and religion although at times silly, was also brave, especially since half of the characters were meant to be of Latin and Middle Eastern origin, having names like Yusuf and Khalil.

Available on Amazon

Although Caprica represented the best of television for 2009 and 2010, with its only equivalent being AMC’s Mad Men surpassing it in the writing department, its cancellation was inevitable. Today more and more entertainment is being geared towards the lowest common denominator, especially on television - where reality shows, second tier sports programs and generic procedural cop dramas, reign supreme. This compounded with the fact that Caprica is an adult character drama that is a spinoff of a kids (albeit quality) sci-fi action series, meant that its producers were always going to have a problem marketing the show to a younger viewer demographic, while still managing to engage an older 25yrs + audience.

If the show was successful, it would have been the latest in the line of rare ground-breaking sci-fi that dared to be anchored in the real world of everyday life. Only a few shows before have succeeded in this respect: Twin Peaks in the late 80s, The X Files throughout the 90s and LOST during the last decade. Each of these shows has generated inferior imitations and copies that are more or less watered down derivatives of the originals, yet forever influencing television and pop culture in general. It is a shame that Caprica never had its chance to grow and do the same. It seems that the television audience is just not ready for adult sci-fi and since the Battlestar Galactica franchise still makes a lot of money from DVD and other merchandise worldwide, it was of no surprise that shortly after Caprica was cancelled, a second prequel show set after its events was announced by its hosting network SyFy. The new show named Blood and Steel (or Blood and Chrome) is going back to the formula of what made Battlestar Galactica a huge success; that being lasers fights, space battles and robots blowing shit up... all of the time.

The decision to do this is sad. Television and entertainment used to be avant-garde, looking for new ways to tell different stories in order to entertain people, instead of just trying to find the quickest means to make a buck. Being 'different' evolves entertainment, however being innovative is not a popular and safe option when it comes to television, which is why today we have 50 different recycled variations of weak low brow shows like CSI and Law and Order. TV executives know what sells, and thus exploits it.

What makes the decision to replace Caprica with Blood and Steel even more sad, is that in two weeks SyFy will air its final 5 episodes which were deferred to early 2011 two months ago. Canadian viewers and some lucky fans who know how to use the internet, have already caught the last 5 episodes and have agreed in consensus that these episodes, including its finale 'Apotheosis', were nothing short of spectacular. After having just watched the last ever episode of Caprica myself, I disagree. The word 'spectacular' does not quite describe how good the finale really is. The last episode should go on record as one of the finest hours in television history, and is testament to the likelihood that its follow-up show Blood and Chrome will never be able to reproduce the maturity and intelligence of what was Caprica.

American East (Review)

2010-12-16T22:15:00.018+04:00

The summer of 2007 is the setting for the overlooked gem American East. Its a hot and sultry L.A. summer and Mustapha Marzoke, the owner of a rundown kebab diner, has plans to move up in the world with the opening of a classy restaurant on the other side of town with his Jewish best friend - while keeping his family together - while surviving The War on Terror's colour coded terror alerts. Promoted as the 'first Arab American drama' of its kind, this underrated feature from director Hesham Issawi that features a 'who's who' of successful Middle Eastern American actors, has 'This is a Spike Lee Joint' written all over it.

Issawi's drama about an Egyptian family carving out its piece of the American Dream in a post 9/11 world, takes a holistic look at virtually all the issues facing the Arab American diaspora and its identity crisis of trying to balance both the East and the West. Starring Iron Man's Sayed Badreya, as well as Tony Shaloub, Anthony Azizi and Eric Averi, American East is a highly polished and slick looking feature that is a welcomed antidote to the usual portrayals of Arabs normally seen in Hollywood.

Amazon DVD

I mentioned Spike Lee in the first paragraph because like that ground breaking director, Hesham Issawi has chosen to approach weighty issues such as race and politics in a direct and unapologetic manner, juxtaposing them with unremarkable yet interesting characters, while generating enough depth and development for them and their situations to keep the audience emotionally invested. American East happens to be written by its lead actor Sayed Badreya; balancing everyday drama with larger political, social and racial issues. Even though his approach comes across as very heavy handed and preachy at times, this feature successfully remains warm, honest and surprisingly creative.

Elements of Do The Right Thing and similar Spike Lee films are seen here; not only in the style of direction but also in the ways the drama and humor of the script are served to veil a brewing tension that eventually ends in some kind of tragedy, punctuating the ridiculousness of the times we live in, and producing a comic yet truthful representation of modern society. For example, right now in the 21st Century, you do not want under any circumstance to be walking through an American airport shouting the name 'Mohamed', even if you, like the character Mustapha, is only desperately looking for your young son who is lost.

As I mentioned before, American East is an underrated feature and this is partly because many people do not know the film even exists. Although production was completed in 2007, a failed attempt to get a theatrical release led to it drifting into a post production-development hell, that finally ended last year with its 2009 DVD release. Regardless, the performances are good. Its young stars Richard Chagoury and Tay Blessey are a joy to watch as the kids in this feature, especially in one scene where Blessey's character delivers a 'drug induced' narration about the roots of the Arab/Israeli conflict over an animated cartoon.

Also starring Tony Shaloub as a Jewish businessman trying to deal with prejudice from both the Arab community and his own Jewish family, his best scenes are with a totally unrecognizable Anthony Azizi, who plays an 'Arabic 50 Cent' hip hop gangsta wannabe. In one scene, his fake gangsta-isms becomes the source for a rather amusing yet sexually explicit exposition on the difference between smoking sheesha, the Arab-Israeli conflict and the technical specifications for performing well during a ménage à trois - so viewer discretion is advised. Eric Averi (The Mummy), Ray Rise (Twin Peaks) and even a brief cameo from Alfre Woodard (Star Trek: First Contact) also add to the lineup of quality actors in this feature.

Of course the focus of American East is its patriarchal protagonist Mustapha, who is brilliantly played by Sayed Badreya, and a character that perfectly embodies the Muslim American experience; an experience characterized by peace, hospitality and idealism, while troubled by tradition, honor and compromise. With him, one cannot help but think that this movie (as good as it is), could have been better if it focused mainly on his plight and his relationship with his son, pot smoking younger daughter and restaurant ambitions, and not so much on the broader issues of 'sex', 'Hollywood stereotypes' and 'terrorism'.

Yet overall American East is a good film, especially the first half. The performances from everyone involved are given their full might because the entire cast seem to truly believe in the positive messages of this film. This helps makes it not just another story about random characters doing random things, but instead a film with genuine heart and a genuine story to tell. 8/10.

DIFF: The King's Speech, Tron 2 and a bunch of Emirati movies

2010-12-12T20:43:00.002+04:00

This year's DIFF (Dubai International Film Festival) is promoting itself as its biggest outing yet. Following hot off the heal's of the shooting of Mission Impossible IV: Ghost Protocol here in Dubai, it seems that the UAE's ambition to be the focal point of all things cinema... despite not yet really having a film industry of its own, is succeeding. Opening the festival today (December 12 2010) will be the world premier of Colin Firth's The King's Speech, while the highly anticipated sequel to Tron, Tron: Legacy will close the event a day after it has its world premier in the US.

Blu ray Amazon

Other (but not so interesting) movies such as 'Biutiful' starring Javier Bardem, Jack Goes Boating with Philip Seymour Hoffman (which is already available on DVD), and 'The Company Men' starring Ben Affleck, Tommy Lee Jones and Kevin Costner, will be screened and most likely forgotten afterwards. These, coupled with the usual screening of those generic Arabic and Indian movies that seem to find their way into the festival each year, may have made 2010's festival an insipid event, if it was not for the actor Sean Penn who is slated to receive a Lifetime Achievement Award, and the 14 'Emirati features' that will be premiering this year.

Last year's City of Life, the UAE's first ever feature movie, was screened to overall good reviews, and has acted as a catalyst of encouragement for more film making from the country, especially Dubai. This year DIFF's 14 submitted Emirati entries, while obviously not big budget features like City of Life, will endeavor to show snapshots of Local life from a variety of perspectives, in a typical 'art house' format. Two of these films which look particularly interesting are Nayla Al Khaja's 'Malal', a short about a young Emirati couple on a rather awkward honeymoon in India, and 'Two Guys and a Goat', that is thankfully billed as an 'action comedy thriller'... and not a film about something else.

In total this year's DIFF features 157 films from 57 countries, of which 54 are world and international premieres - 58 marking their debut in the Middle East and 32 in the Gulf region.

Tron 2 (Legacy) Premiers in Dubai.

The Shortlist for 'The Arabic Booker' 2011 announced.

2010-12-11T11:59:00.001+04:00

A couple weeks back I wrote a post on the Arab Booker Prize's questionable promotional ethics for 2011's nominees. I took issue with the organization's apparent gloating over the fact that a large number of women made this year's longlist of nominees as compared to the previous year which virtually had no women on its list. I felt it necessary to question whether the nominations were based on the quality of the writing or the genders of the author, as I believe that both positive and negative discrimination severely undermines the integrity for the award. M. Lynx Qualey over at 'Arabic Literature' (Arablit.wordpress.com) picked up the piece, drew regional attention to it, and thus a little hilarity ensued.

This week the shortlist for the nominees was announced, and although I still have to question the quality of one of the books nominated, it seems that the role of 'gender' in the decision making process has now been officially significantly played down, even though two of those nominated are women.

The Iraqi novelist Fadhil al Azzawi who chairs the judging panel said:

"We don't care where the author is from or how famous he or she is, we don't care about gender or age or who published the book or even if the author has previously submitted a work to the award or not. All we care about as a panel of judges is the importance of the literary novel and the beauty of the work of fiction, and the ability of each author to create a world of imaginative creativity in the novel."

So I guess the official words spoken by the Chair of Judges a month ago of: “We are delighted with the very high percentage of women who reached the longlist compared with previous years…” will now be quietly ignored from hereon?

Regardless, at least it seems like the award is taking a step in the right direction, and hopefully starting from next year gender (and by extension nationality?) will no longer be an issue. The six authors ranging from Saudi Arabia, Sudan, Morocco and Egypt, that have been shortlisted for the fourth International Prize for Arabic Fiction 2011 are Khaled al-Berry (for Middle Eastern Dance), Miral al-Tahawy (for Brooklyn Heights); Raja Alem (for The Doves’ Necklace) Amir Taj al-Sir (for The Hunter of the Chrysalises) Bensalem Himmich (for My Tormentor) and Mohammed Achaari (for The Arch and the Butterfly). The winner will be announced in Abu Dhabi on March 14, as part of the Abu Dhabi International Book Fair.

Each of the shortlisted authors will receive US$10,000 (Dh37,000). The eventual winner will be awarded $50,000 (Dh184.000). The winning novel will also be translated into English, giving it access to a huge international market. Previous winners include Bahaa Taher in 2008 for Sunset Oasis, Youssef Ziedan, in 2009 for Azazel and Abdo Khal, for Spewing Sparks as Big as Castles in 2010.

Redefining an Icon: Nolan's Batman.

2010-12-04T12:02:00.005+04:00

In 1990 Tim Burton took the campy TV and comic book icon of Batman and placed him in a weird but adult hyper-reality. Successfully rebooting the franchise for a Millennial audience, Batman suddenly became extremely cool yet extremely surreal. Unfortunately as the franchise developed, that hyper-reality rapidly descended into nothing more than a campy big screen version of the 1960s TV series with Joel Schumacher at its helm. His 'creative' vision of the character took Batman's Gotham City from a dark Gothic postmodern landscape dominated by stone gargoyles and gothic architecture to a red and green neon nightmare populated by big name celebrities, who had all inexplicably lost their abilities to act. Eventually Schumacher became known for almost totally destroying the franchise.

Eight years later Christopher Nolan was drafted in to quietly reboot the Batman brand. With little marketing and virtually zero pre-release hype, Batman Begins snuck up on the audience with a surprisingly grownup story that seemed grounded in the real world, where the city of Chicago now went by the name of Gotham City. Gone were the over the top super-villains, Tim Burton's hyper reality and Schumacher's bat nipples and in came the corporate politics, corrupt law officials and the Italian Mob. Batman Begins and its hugely successful follow-up The Dark Knight have now been noted as two of Hollywood's all-time greatest movies and make up two thirds of a trilogy that I just cannot get enough of.

Blu Ray - Amazon

Although this new trilogy (the third part 'The Dark Knight Rises' set for release within the next two years) carries on in the tradition of the previous outings of the movie franchise by featuring uber A-listers in an ensemble cast, the similarities pretty much end there. Director Nolan's style of film making tends to favour real world characters in real world situations, despite the obvious fantasy elements that make up their stories. Like The Prestige and Inception, his Batman movies take the spectacular and make it the ordinary, providing much needed gravitas to both the sci-fi and fantasy genres.

The films can also be essentially categorized as 'film noir', from its references to those 1950s detective novels and Frank Miller's The Dark Knight Returns graphic novel, while the visual style is comparable to Fritz Lang's Metropolis, Ridley Scott's Blade Runner, and even to some extent Tim Burton's Batman Returns.

Batman Begins and The Dark Knight are indeed 'dark' movies. Gotham City is no longer the dark Gothic twisted hyper-reality from Tim Burton's movies; instead it is now a different kind of 'dark'; a realistic and violent metropolis that is governed by a corrupt law system, that instead of trying to contain crime, it exploits it and breeds it. It is a city that can very well be home to Law and Order, NYPD Blue or any other gritty TV procedural cop drama. Michael Peters writing on Suite 101 accurately describes Gotham City as a 'morally barren landscape' that only contains three men willing enough to take on the role of cleaning it up.

All three men represent different modes of the male perspective. Harvey Dent is the idealist who believes change can occur through effort and determination. Batman, on the other hand, desires alterations but is conflicted on how to go about achieving it. Lieutenant Gordon (Gary Oldman) covets modifications but is also a man who understands the corruption and decay that probes the individual. He is an idealist but with a greater sense of awareness and understanding then Dent and Batman. These three characters help to complete each other and yet remain individualistic in their beliefs and actions.

BD Live Blu ray Amazon

Furthermore the relationship between Harvey Dent and Bruce Wayne are essentially a representation of Ying and Yang. However since real life is seldom black and white in its totality, the difference between the two sides is one of a lighter verses a darker shade of grey. So while Harvey Dent is known throughout the Dark Knight as Gotham's 'White Knight', Bruce Wayne is represented as the darker and necessary alternative needed to help keep the city in order, even after Dent goes on a killing spree as the evil 'Two Face.' Ultimately it is this character interplay and their relationships that help elevate this current series above all the previous movies and TV shows.

In the original Tim Burton version of the franchise the director 'brings a literal and figurative darkness to Batman and the streets of Gotham City' where...

The audience is introduced to Batman within the first few minutes of the film, however Jack Nicholson perfectly cast as The Joker steals the show in character development, screen time and onscreen charisma. As a result, either directly or from the natural flow of making the remaining films, Burton sets the precedent of having the villains outshine Batman. A definite no-no in a film with the Caped Crusader as "the star." Unfortunately, Batman never gets to shine in any of the four films, which is not an issue in Batman Begins.

By grounding Batman/Bruce Wayne in a the 'real world' of Batman Begins, other issues regarding what it is to be a regular human and what it means to be a 'Super' are given gravitas for examination and analysis. This approach was first done when M Knight Shayamalan was still making good movies with his cutting edge Unbreakable, where the dichotomy between the Superhero and Supervillain are broken down to its core components. 'Nolan takes this exact approach stripping his hero off all the convenient powers, which would later be displayed one by one in the climactic battle with the villain, much earlier in the script and then rebuilding him with all the necessary ones, the origins of which are neatly explained and logically built up.' Says Srinivas Kanchibhotla at Idle Brain.com. Thus we first see this played out between Bruce Wayne and Ras Al Gul in Batman Begins and then a full on examination of that relationship within the Dark Knight with the arrival of the Joker.

All the subtexts, deeper meanings, hidden manifestos aside, [superheroes and super villains] are really about the eternal clash of good and the evil. How within the framework of the story can the super hero and the super villain, standing on the far sides of the spectrum, spar, makes up for the traditional good versus the evil struggle. To elevate the 'super' status of the hero, a weird, eccentric, and an almost 'super' villain is created, empowering him with the weaknesses and the vulnerabilities of the hero.

The classical role of the superhero being the absolute poster child for moral clarity is shattered in Nolan's universe. Here, even though evil is evil, good is not exactly good, despite its leading protagonist's best attempts to maintain a clear balance between right and wrong. Unlike in Spiderman, Iron Man and the previous Batman movies, Batman Begins and The Dark Knight shows that even a superhero's moral certainty could have no viable place in the real world. As Bruce Wayne, Harvey Dent and Commissioner Gordan try to reel the Joker in, a debate begins, questioning whether is it permissible to bend the rules in order to combat terror, or must good always be 'good'? I use the word 'Terror', because the Joker and this dilemma blatantly represent the dilemma Osama Bin Laden and Al Qa3da possess to America and its people when confronted with anarchy.

Over the course of the film, Bruce Wayne finds himself falling deeper and deeper into an abyss of moral uncertainty that has no clear bottom, as he is tries... but spectacularly fails to adhere to his own basic principles of freedom, integrity and moral absolutism. Despite chastising Harvey Dent for using torture on a mentally ill criminal to get information, Bruce Wayne himself employs the exact same methods on the Joker later on in the film - a method which ultimately backfires - directly resulting in the death of the character Rachel Dawes, his love interest.

When The Bush Administration took a stand for 'morality' and said heroism and war were easy and that any action was better than the 'inaction of consideration', this naive world-view, (reminiscent of a child's comic book or cartoon) ultimately came back and bit him on his ass. This is the cold reality of the real world and this is the world that the Dark Knight inhabits and thus makes him a real Icon for the 21st Century.

Cutting Edge Middle Eastern Cinema: Hamam, Man of Ashes

2010-12-03T23:59:00.005+04:00

Tunisia and Turkey.

As you can imagine with Middle Eastern cinema, there are taboo subject areas and then there are very taboo subject areas. Representation of sexuality can fall under the latter. There are only a few films in both Western and Eastern cinema that dare to tackle the matter in a serious, realistic and unprejudiced approach. This is not to say that the subjects of sex and sexuality generally do not appear in Middle Eastern movies as it is more common than you would believe, however its just that when they do portray it, its a cringe worthy experience to watch. An example of this that immediately comes to mind is the gay character 'Hatem Rachid' and the totally unsympathetic 'prostitute' 'Buthanya ElSayid', both from the Yacoubian Building.

I have already touched on three other movies on this blog that deal with sexuality in one way or another in a more grounded approach in the movies Eyes Wide Open, Caramel and The Kite Runner. These films deal with the subject matter of sexuality in a way that never goes the route of sensationalism when portraying sex, nor comedy when portraying homosexuality, nor eroticism when portraying lesbianism. Instead they choose to focus on the characters as individuals and not on their sexual experiences as measuring sticks to define them.

Man of Ashes (Review)

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One of the more serious Arab movies dealing with sexuality and its negative effects is Tunisia's Man of Ashes. Like The Kite Runner, it deals with child rape and its psychological impact that can last into adulthood. This movie examines the subject from the perspective of two grown adults; survivors of child sexual abuse. Both abused by their mentor, a local and trusted carpenter, each finds different ways to deal with the traumatic events of their youth. Here, one becomes almost psychotic and criminally inclined, while the other descends into depression, a depression that is further deepened when he is soon to marry.

As you can imagine, any film about the sexual abuse of children is not going to be easy to watch, and in this respect Man of Ashes is consistent. This feature from writer and director Nouri Bouzid is a deadly serious drama that pulls no punches in its delivery.

There is not much more that can be added about this movie, accept that it is a brave and highly commendable feature that dares to deal with the subjects of both homosexuality and child abuse head on, while never allowing for its bad guy to either become a faceless monster or someone we as the audience should have to relate to, or understand (like for example in Hollywood's disgusting take on the subject in X Files 2).

Hamam 'Steam' The Turkish Bath (Review)

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Hats off to the marketing team for doing a lousy job at promoting this movie. Brutally and badly mismarketed as some kind of homoerotic drama about infidelity courtesy of a dodgy trailer and an even dodgier DVD cover art (see left), when it is anything but, The Turkish Bath is actually an intelligent art house drama that is more about one man's love affair with the city of Istanbul than it is about whom he, and his wife are cheating with behind each other's backs.

Featuring Italian action villain Alessandro Gassman, (most well known as the 'bad guy' in The Transporter 2) this offbeat drama focuses on a highly strung-out Italian business man who discovers that he has inherited a dilapidated steam house from his estranged aunt and thus finds himself travelling to Istanbul to sell it. Upon arrival in the city, he quickly befriends the family who had been maintaining it, while becoming captivated by the warmth of the city's people. He decides to stay and in the process falls in love with another man, while ruffling the feathers of a powerful local business woman who is intent on knocking down the steam house to make way for a new residential and commercial mega-development.

The main theme of this movie is about the effects of karma. Via several plot twists throughout the story we see how the lives, loves and actions of the main character's dead aunt, his wife and himself continually manifest themselves throughout their journeys in both realistic and absurd circumstances. The central characters of the husband and wife are rich with depth and development as the story follows their interaction with the close nit Turkish family and their community - and how this exposure eventually helps them find their own true selves and the importance of not only family, but the role of community in one's life.

Although the ending is a downbeat and totally left-field shocker, its conclusion is also strangely uplifting and rewarding. On the downside, Hamam does suffer from the weak writing of its supporting characters, especially where one crucial element of the film examining the important development of a relationship between two of its key protagonists - is reduced to a cheesy 60 second montage of images. Yet overall the acting is excellent; the story is simple and sweet, while the cinematography is top notch. Furthermore, Faisal Taher's soundtrack adds layers upon layers to the greatness to this overlooked, underrated and controversial film.

The Others (Review)

2010-12-02T20:13:00.021+04:00

If I had to describe Nicole Kidman's The Others in just one word, it would be 'classy'. In an age of excessive violence, CGI, blood letting and gore, The Other's stands out as one of the best horror movies made in the past 10 years by simply being different. Here violence is left to a bare minimum, while special effects are saved to the very end in this intelligent, creepy and highly atmospheric thriller.

The Others [Blu Ray]

In this Hitchcock styled story set at the end of WW2, Kidman plays a lone mother trying to cope with her two photosensitive children after all of her servants and maids mysteriously vanish over night from their huge isolated mansion. Since the children are photosensitive it means that they can neither leave the house, nor have any of its curtains or doors left open.

Even though much needed help and company arrives in the form of three mysterious strangers searching for employment, Kidman's character is slowly forced to accept that either something supernatural is also dwelling in the house with them, or that her new guests have ulterior motives. What eventually unfolds is a power play between her, the new 'help' and her young daughter as religion, nihilism, acceptance and denial all come head to head.

The Others is pure old school horror, the type of horror that you would read in dusty hardback novels at the back of a library somewhere and not the 80s tits and ass slasher type you would have seen in the back of your video store. An example of Postmodern literature and film, with a dark ending even Fredrick Nietzsche would be proud of , this movie is a re-envisioning of the Henry James' novel The Turn of the Screw, which in itself has been adapted and re-written in a multiple of ways, including The Innocents, while being a heavy influence on A Tale Of Two Sisters and its remake The Uninvited.

How to write about Arabia (and the Middle East)

2010-11-29T20:13:00.006+04:00

The Kingdom Blu ray - Amazon

The following post about Orientalism, which 'originally' appeared on KaboobFest.com was so good, I felt the need to reproduce it here on my blog. This fun piece mainly refers to Arabs but it can be applied to wider representations of the Middle East. I have added extra references to books and films from Amazon that this article can refer too.

Some tips: Sheikhs and suicide bombings are good.

Always use the word ‘Sand’ or ‘Darkness’ or ‘Whispers’ in your title. Subtitles may include the words ‘Islam’, ‘Jihad’, ‘Desert’, ‘Dawn’, ‘Struggle’, ‘Oil’, ‘Orient’, ‘Arabia’, ‘Calling’, ‘Veil’, ‘Allah’ or ‘Anger’. Also useful are words such as ‘Terrorists’, ‘Timeless’, ‘Fundamentalism’ and ‘Tribal’. Note that you must always refer to Arab people as the “Arab Street”.

Under no circumstances should you have a picture of a well-adjusted Arab on the cover of your book, or in it; sometimes you may make mention of certain well-rounded Arabs, but only to highlight their differences with the West. An AK-47, a mosque, and the desert: use these. If you must include an Arab, make sure you get one in a veil or burning an American or Israeli flag.

In your text, treat the Middle East as if it were one country, and constantly refer to it as ‘Arabia’. It is hot and dusty with rolling sand dunes and huge herds of camels, because they are the only animals that are strong enough to live in such a harsh climate. Don’t get bogged down with precise descriptions. The Middle East is big: twenty-two countries, 300 million people who are too busy fighting and dying and warring and bombing themselves to read your book. The continent is full of deserts, jungles, highlands and many other things, but your reader doesn’t care about all that, so keep your descriptions mysterious and exotic and unparticular. Also, make sure that you mention that Turkey, Iran or Afghanistan are not Arab countries, but then continue to refer to them as if they were. Because, although you are worldly and realize the differences, they all sort of look the same so it doesn’t matter.

Make sure you show how Arabs are completely different from the West, and do things no other humans do. Do not mention music, television or bars; the mosque is an Arab’s entertainment of choice, along with jihad, war, tribal meetings, gutting sheep, cutting off limbs, and having arguments about the inferiority of women. Make sure you show that you are able to partake in such acts without flinching, and describe how you learn to understand this perspective—because you care.

Taboo subjects: ordinary domestic scenes, love between Arabs (unless honor killing is involved), references to Arabs having fun, references to Arabs not hating the US, mention of school-going children who have no intention of blowing themselves up. Make no mention of Christian Arabs, Jewish Arabs, black Arabs, or blond Arabs. All Arabs are Muslim, and all Arabs are dark (but not too dark).

You may show Arabs partaking in everyday life, but always sound slightly astonished at how they can cook, clean, and sometimes (but rarely) laugh, given their strict Islamic tradition. Make sure to mention that despite partaking in everyday actions, they do so under “the watchful eyes of the oppressive regime/father/mullah”. Also, any mention of school should also be accompanied with the topic of “madressas”. This is when you show the clip of faceless young Arabs banging their head on the ground.

Throughout the book, adopt a bad Arabic accent, in conspiracy with the reader, and an angry, helpless tone. Establish early on that your liberalism is impeccable, and mention near the beginning how much you understand why all Arabs hate the US, how you sympathize with the repressed “Arab street”, despite their backwards nature. If you are a man, take it upon yourself to save the beautiful veiled woman from her oppressive society. If you are a woman, treat Arabia as a man who is oppressive, traditional, and yet strangely kind and caring. Arabia is to be pitied, feared or liberated. Whichever angle you take, be sure to leave the strong impression that without your intervention and your important book, the “Arab Street” is doomed.

Your Arab characters may include young fundamentalist men, highly sexualized yet repressed females, and devout Muslims who are against jihad. Or corrupt leaders, poor Bedouins, rich sheikhs, and harem prostitutes you have slept with. The devout Muslim’s goal must always be to reclaim Islam from the Fundamentalists, and makes constant references to the fact that ‘radical Islam is the exception not the rule’, so that your readers are clear that, like them, you are not anti-Islam. The Modern Arab is a fat man who steals and works in the visa office, refusing to give work permits to qualified Westerners who really care about Arabia. He is an enemy of change, always using his government job to make it difficult for pragmatic and good-hearted expats to set up NGOs or Women Shelters. Or he is an Oxford-educated intellectual turned serial-killing politician in an Armani suit. He is a cannibal who likes Cristal champagne, and his mother is a rich and unveiled businesswoman who runs a harem.

Among your characters you must always include The Hysterical Mother, who can’t speak any English and wanders the refugee camp slapping herself and screaming and cursing at the West. Her children are young fundamentalists, and she is shown weeping for fear that her sons will turn out to be suicide bombers. She must look utterly helpless, and snot must run down her nose. She can have no past, no history; such diversions ruin the dramatic moment. Moans are good. She must never say anything about herself in the dialogue except to speak of her (unspeakable) suffering. Also be sure to include a warm and beautiful veiled woman who has a shy laugh and who is concerned for her country. These characters should buzz around your main hero, making him look good. Your hero can teach them, bathe them, feed them; he carries lots of babies and has seen Death. Your hero is you (if reportage), or a beautiful, tragic international celebrity/aristocrat who has converted to Islam (if fiction).

Bad Western characters may include the Bush administration, Western expats who molest women, employees of the World Bank. When talking about exploitation by foreigners mention the US and the word “imperialism” repeatedly. Blame the West for Arabia’s situation. But do not be too specific.

Broad brushstrokes throughout are good. Avoid having the Arab characters laugh, or struggle to educate their kids, or just make do in mundane circumstances. Have them illuminate something about Europe or America in the Middle East. Arab characters should be mysterious, exotic, and traditional—but all must hate the US. It is the good Arabs that do not act on these feelings. Don’t try too hard to explain to your audience why they hate the US, because doing so would be racist towards their “Islamic civilization”. Accept the fact that you will be hated, and try and work through these feelings—but only with the good Arabs. A soundtrack of quick Arabic gibberish, and the azzan sound should accompany the bad Arabs while they speak.

Make sure to impress upon your readers how Arabia was nothing before oil, and will be nothing again when oil runs out. Don’t mention education, or technology (mobiles will destroy the sense of endless rolling desert). These things are not relevant when discussing the Land of Arabia, only oil is. Every Arab must be described in national dress, with the phrase: “flowing white robes” or “immaculate white robes”. Don’t forget to impress upon your reader how immaculate and how dazzling white those robes are. Muse repeatedly on the amazing ability of the peoples of Arabia to keep their flowing white robes so dazzlingly white. The women of Arabia must always be described as “black veiled women” and always in the plural. Never “wife”; always “wives”. Every airport must have a scene where an Arabian man in flowing white robes is accompanied by several black-veiled wives.

Describe, in detail, the call to prayer (azzan, loud, haunting, conservative, bombed) or smelly, dirty markets. Also, sex is very important, so go into detail about the differences in the ways Arabs have and think about sex. And naked bodies. Or, better, naked dead bodies. And especially blown up naked dead bodies. Remember, any work you submit in which people look filthy and miserable and angry will be referred to as the ‘real Arabia’, and you want that on your dust jacket. Do not feel queasy about this: you are trying to help them be understood by the West. Animals, on the other hand, must be treated as well rounded, complex characters. This should be easy, as camels are the only animals that exist in the Middle East, other than scarabs and cockroaches.

Readers will be put off if you don’t mention the markets in Arabia. They are always loud and dirty. There is always someone who is spitting phlegm. Small, winding alleys and bazaars are critical—Arabia is the Land of Mystery and Exoticisim. Talk about the beauty of the rolling sand dunes and the geographical landscape, that continues to be beautiful despite the type of people that inhabit it. When your main character is in a desert living with indigenous peoples (anybody short and/or dirty) it is okay to mention that Arabia has been severely depopulated by War and Jihad (use caps).

You’ll also need a nightclub called Tropicana, where mercenaries, evil nouveau riche Arabs and prostitutes and guerrillas and expats hang out.

Always end your book or movie with the azzan resonating through an abandoned market place during sunset, calling everyone to prayer. Seriously, don’t forget the haunting wail of the azzan. Repeatedly. Because you care. [End]

For a more serious read about Orientalism, I would recommend Edward Sayid's 'Orientalism' and 'Reel Bad Arabs How Hollywood Vilifies a People' by Jack Shaneen.